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The Halloween store

There is a Halloween store set up in the corpse of the old Circuit City building. I can’t remember if such stores existed when I was a child, but in the past few years they’ve become popular in my town. The Halloween stores appear out of nowhere at the end of September, rent a huge empty space left by a recently deceased store, and then just as quickly disappear by the first days of November, making me wonder if they existed at all. You never know where they’ll show up next year, so you just have to keep a lookout for the big yellow banner hanging outside your local strip mall.

I went to the Circuit City Halloween store yesterday to look for a costume for the Run Like Hell race that is only a week away. It was odd to see rows of ghost masks and sexy nurse costumes lining the walls store, instead of the rows of flatscreen TVs that I remember. It was rather depressing to look at all the female costumes that […]

The Scholastic Book Club

Does anyone else remember the Scholastic Book Club?

When I was in elementary school, once a month the teacher would distribute the book club flyers. They were printed on flimsy paper, almost like tissues, but they were full color and advertised all sorts of books. There was something about flipping through the flyer, reading the descriptions and seeing the covers, that was almost more exciting than reading the books, perhaps because the book club combined two great things: reading and shopping!

Every promo listed the price of the book and an id number for you to pencil in on your order form to be submitted to your teacher with your payment. I had a budget, so I could not order all the books I wanted at once. Sometimes I would keep an eye on a book advertised in every issue until I finally marked it on my order form. Then the teacher sent in the orders and a couple weeks later the books would arrive! The best part however was the lovely anticipation, knowing books were on […]

All I want for Christmas is my Amazon.com commissions

I hope everyone had a happy tofurkey day yesterday. I made a vow not to overeat and did pretty well until they brought out three types of cake and one pie. Mmmmm, pie. I went for a walk afterwards, which undid about 10% of the damage. (For the curious among you, the cakes were Pumpkin Angel Food, Bacardi Rum, and Italian Creme – all very delicious.)

If you are shopping today, like so many Americans, good luck to you and don’t forget your scarf! I froze my ass off in line at a Circuit City two years ago at 4:30am to get some bargain USB drives. It was fun to do once, but I don’t have any desire to relive the experience. If you prefer to stay at home and shop online in your pajamas with a warm cup of coffee, and you’re shopping at Amazon.com anyway, please consider clicking through to the store via one of my links. If you do so, I earn a small commission on any item you put in your cart […]

Saturday night is alright for chopping and shopping

This Saturday I turned the corner of the organic grocery store past the plastic wrapped chicken wraps to find a delightful surprise. Free cookies! In a basket before me there were tiny little cookies the size of a quarter (or a bottle cap for you foreigners since I don’t know how to do currency conversions in respect to size). Next to them was a sampler tray of four different flavors of nut clusters. And down the next aisle were slices of bread and olive oil. And down the next aisle were samples of a protein bar. And around the other corner were some apple slices and caramel dip. Yes, I walked around the entire store searching for each free sample station, just like I was playing a video game and looking for all the secret item locations. Saturdays are evidently free sample days at my local, little, whole foods chain and I think that’s reason enough to start going there every weekend. Now I can have a little treat once a week without pigging out […]

Gone Swimmin’

What do you do when you are stressed about naming your book? You shop, of course! Spending unbudgeted money on clothing sure beats eating a pint of ice cream. Of course, when the garment you are looking for is a swimsuit it’s quite possible it might make your stress levels rise instead of fall. But I am paying my rent every month on time, so I figure I should take advantage of the pool my dollars are helping maintain. I also finally feel thin enough that the idea of swimsuit shopping only launches me to 50%-60% of my maximum heart rate instead of 80%-90%.

I honestly can’t remember the last time I bought a swimsuit. It was probably the 90’s. I can’t remember the last time I went swimming either, but I think it was in the lake at my friend’s house, a home they don’t even own anymore. I also forgot to bring my swimsuit home because I left it to dry in their bathroom. I did not get it back until my ass could […]

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Jennette Fulda tells stories to the Internet about her life as a smartass, writer, weight-loss inspiration, chronic headache sufferer, and overall nice person (who is silently judging you). She does this at JennetteFulda.com now, but you can still have fun perusing her past here.

Disclaimer: I am not responsible for keyboards ruined by coffee spit-takes or forehead wrinkles caused by deep thought.

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