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Looking good under fluorescent lights

I finally renewed my driver’s license last month. Between the 190 pound weight loss and the LASIK, I was mildly worried I would get to the Bureau of Motor Vehicles (BMV) and they’d accuse me of strangling the real Jennette Fulda, stuffing her in a deep freeze, and stealing her identity. If I had been hit by a bus on the way there, I wouldn’t have been surprised if the police report said, “There was no identification on the victim’s body, but she appears to have mugged a fat girl before she was run over.”

The clerk at the counter, who had far better hair and complexion than I’d expect from an employee of the Bureau of Motor Vehicles, asked me, “Has any information on your driver’s license changed since your last renewal? Are you still 5′ 9″ and weigh 250 – whoa, girl you do not weigh 250 pounds.”

I admitted I didn’t even weigh 250 pounds when I said I weighed 250 pounds. She congratulated me and thankfully did not accuse me of identify theft. […]

And what do you blog about?

When I was at the BlogHer convention this year one of the first stabs people made at small talk was to ask, “What do you blog about?” The first time I was asked this I replied without hesitation, “I’m a weight-loss blogger,” but immediately realized that coming from a mouth attached to a body wearing a size small t-shirt this sounded KRAZEE. Quickly I threw in, “I’ve lost 200 pounds!” in a desperate attempt to justify my blog’s purpose, as if I was screaming, “See! I had a legitimate medical reason to lose weight! I’m not some kooky thin girl that hates her body and thinks she needs to lose 50 pounds to become the emaciated cover girl for Anorexia Annual. Okay? Me not crazy! I’ll stop yelling at you now!”

However, sticking in that rider at the end wasn’t that much better because people kind of freak out when they learn how much weight I’ve lost. After I told one girl, her eyes popped out of her head and we had to crawl around on […]

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Man looking into telescope

Jennette Fulda tells stories to the Internet about her life as a smartass, writer, weight-loss inspiration, chronic headache sufferer, and overall nice person (who is silently judging you). She does this at JennetteFulda.com now, but you can still have fun perusing her past here.

Disclaimer: I am not responsible for keyboards ruined by coffee spit-takes or forehead wrinkles caused by deep thought.

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European Vacation

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