When I was in North Carolina, we went to see Stereolab play, only my brain got a little twisted and thought we were going to see Stereophonics. So when a French chick with a keyboard walked out, I had a small epiphany. “Oh, StereoLAB! They’re good too, but I guess they won’t be playing the theme to the British version of The Office.” Stereolab was good, but their opening act, Atlas Sound…well, I hope someone steals the audio equipment off his tour bus so he will stop spreading his sonic misery across the country.
During the concert I witnessed the most odd and extraordinary bout of multi-tasking that I’ve ever seen. It was so weird that I did my best to record the action for you, as though I was present for a yeti sighting. Alas, the room was lit only by Christmas lights, so even after applying a brightening filter it’s hard to tell what this woman is doing. She’s dancing while knitting.
I am impressed 1) That she can knit in the dark whereas I always have to glance at my stitches when I watch TV and 2) That she has such amazing dexterity. She’s really shaking her tail feather, and yet she can purl one, knit two without dropping a stitch while the beat drops. I have to wonder though, why she is knitting in the dark at a Stereolab concert? Is there an impending birth for which she absolutely must finish a baby bonnet? Is she like Madame Defarge and secretly transcribing the music of the event to later be translated into MP3 format to bootleg on the Internet?
The strangest place I’ve ever knitted was the world’s most boring Calculus class my freshman year of college, taught by a Korean TA with poor English skills. I brought the knitting mostly out of boredom. The only entertaining moment of that class was when the instructor was talking about a function called “F of U” written like Fu but through his thick accent accidentally told the class to fuck off.
Overall the concert was great, especially since they sold earplugs at the bar for only 50 cents. They could have gorged me for at least three dollars. What hospitable people! I also got the scoop on the best place to park from Lanae, my BlogAds sales rep, because their offices are literally across the street from the club. BlogAds is responsible for the ads that sometimes appear in the right sidebar, usually for SELF magazine or the latest fiction release. I visited their offices earlier in the day and grabbed some free T-shirts, including my new Perez Hilton pink tee. No one there was knitting while working.