I got back from Boston last night and I’d like to thank those of you who know where I live for not taking that opportunity to rob me blind. I don’t have anything valuable anyway, except for my wit, which I carry with me always.
I hopped on the scale this morning fully prepared for a 2-5 pound weight gain. Actually, that’s a lie, I never hop on my scale. I think repeatedly hopping on a scale would probably break it. I stepped on my scale until it went BEEP, BEEP to indicate it was done judging me, as apposed to most people who just silently judge me, and I hesitantly peaked at the number between my toes:
My lowest weight yet.
Evidently my body has an even stranger sense of humor than I do. I have several complex theories on how this might have happened, involving dehydration, walking all over town, eating three big meals instead of smaller meals with snacking, and of course my menstrual cycle. Always got to throw in my menstrual cycle. Those kooky ovaries, you never know what they’ll throw at you next!
I have no idea how many calories I consumed, but they were calories from all over the world. In the past four days I’ve eaten Vietnamese, Greek, Italian, Mexican, Japanese and Korean food, all without getting my passport stamped. While eating out was fun, I started to miss my home-cooked eating lifestyle. It seems you can’t order a meal without someone throwing rice or bread or pasta or more bread on it. I order a salad and they still have to throw a piece of garlic toast on there!
Mostly this annoys me because I’m still learning to fight the urge to clear my plate. I tell myself “PastaQueen, just because they put food in front of you doesn’t mean you have to eat it.” Then it’s devour, scarf, gobble, where did that piece of garlic toast go? Oh yeah, I put it in my stomach for safe keeping. I think I’m going to have to start throwing food I don’t want on my companions’ plates or at other patrons who are yapping on their phones too loudly.
I was impressed with my future sister-in-law’s ability to eat only part of her meal. She’s shorter and thinner than me, so it figures she wouldn’t need to eat the huge servings restaurants pile in front of you. I also noticed she eats slower, which probably helps her determine when she’s full more accurately since it takes a couple minutes for your stomach to tell your brain that. If I were to issue some suggestions for revisions to the human body, instantaneous stomach capacity readings would be one of them, along with removal of the gall bladder (stupid, useless organ) and maybe a third arm. I felt weird noticing her eating habits since it seems like the sort of thing someone who is diet-obsessed or has an eating disorder would notice, neither of which I desire to be. But since monitoring my food intake has become such a routine part of my life I can’t help but view other people’s eating habits through that same filter.
While we did do a lot of walking, I do more on my trail walks than we did any day between T-stops and Duck Tours. I felt very in-shape. I even outlasted my thinner high-school friend who showed me around Cambridge. I can go for miles, baby! My mom said she did more walking this week than she had all month, which personally I think is a good thing. I hope she keeps it up.
The hallway in my brother’s apartment complex leading to the elevator is covered in mirrors. Mirrors on the left, mirrors at the end, there’s even a mirror on the ceiling of the elevator. Perhaps this is some sort of vampire detection system. (But what are they doing to protect us from the werewolves, hmm?) The nice thing about it was that I got to check out my image whenever we were coming or going and each time I’d think, “Damn, I look good.” It’s great not being disgusted by your image! I highly recommend it.