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Christmas Binge

Oink! I don’t think I could have pigged out more over Christmas if I’d grown a curly tail and started rolling around in the mud. Do you know how hard it is to find mud in December?

The Christmas Eve family get-together went fine. I had a bit of cheesecake, but otherwise stuck to the plan. Then on Christmas day I inhaled my weight in chocolate. Who needs to chew when you can just snort the stuff? My mother got a fancy, dual layer plate thing-ama-jig from a friend and used it to display candy. I fell into the “just one more piece” mentality and ended up eating way too much and feeling sick later. Will I never learn?

Then on the day after Christmas my mother decided to buy clearance candy, so again, I saw and I ate. I wish she didn’t feel the need to buy stuff simply because it’s on sale. I think she’d buy cyanide capsules if they were 2 for the price of 1. To finish off this week of decadence, my mother’s birthday was yesterday, so we had a delicious black forest cake. Mmmm, frosting.

Wow, that was like a good old Catholic confessional, wasn’t it? Bless me father for I have eaten way too frickin’ much. The funniest thing though was that I sneaked a peak on the scales on the morning of the 27th just to see how much damage I had done. I’d actually lost 2 pounds since Saturday. I think the scale has been infected by a computer virus written by a hacker with a demented sense of humor. That or all that chocolate acted as a laxative and completely cleaned out my system. Either way, I seriously doubt that will hold until my next Saturday weigh-in.

I wish I hadn’t indulged quite as much as I did, but I can’t really beat myself up over it since I’ve been sooooo good this year. Plus, the next time I eat candy is probably going to be Easter. This was like getting 5 months of candy eating done in just 3 days. I’m so efficient!

Chocolate & Vicodin: My Quest for Relief from the Headache that Wouldn't Go Away
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7 Comments

Kirsten • December 28, 2005 at 11:15 am

Finding mud: Come to Edinburgh and walk towards my workplace, nearly killing self by slipping on said substance.

Well, it wouldn’t have happened had I not been wearing silly girly shoes. And I didn’t actually fall on my bum.

(This is merely persiflage intended to disguise the fact that I know exactly what you’re talking about, above. C’mon, how much damage CAN a person do in just three days? Not much, right?)

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Fatslayer • December 28, 2005 at 12:36 pm

Confession is good for the soul – plus we get absolution, right? So that means the calories will be cancelled out in the long run. ;o)

I don’t think a 3 day blow-out is the end of the world – plus efficiency of that magnitude deserves to be applauded.

Roll on Easter…oink!

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ashley • December 28, 2005 at 1:59 pm

The more I held off the more I binged. I feel your pain lol. Congrats on the weight loss. Want to send some of that luck of this way? ;-)

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Steve • December 29, 2005 at 2:19 pm

I hate that you binged. Its a shame people surround us with that stuff especially when so many of us are prone to depression. Kepp it in perspective and keep fighting.

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kathryn • December 29, 2005 at 2:54 pm

I feel oddly hungry now. I kinda miss that Christmas chocolate binge. I’ve been picking on chocolates and stuff ever since. Mayhaps I should have got it all out of my system.

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Milana • December 29, 2005 at 10:54 pm

I just wanted to say that I have been reading your blog for the last few weeks, and that you have been a huge inspiration for me. You should be very proud of how far you have come, and I look forward to reading about the rest of your journey.

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Kari • March 12, 2007 at 2:42 pm

I was told by a medical professional that it can take up to two weeks for weight to show up, after I expressed surprise in not gaining any weight a few days after a “binge.” When I do have a binge, it always seems like I’m trying to do damage control afterwards. I have to confess how bad I’ve been to someone, anyone, and then I hit the gym hard, sort of a pre-emptive strike against the inevitable weight gain that may or may not show up in 2 weeks! It’s a vicious cycle and mentality.

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Comments are now closed on all PastaQueen entries. The blog is an archive only so I don't have to deal with spammers. For fresh discussions please visit my new blog at JennetteFulda.com.

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Jennette Fulda tells stories to the Internet about her life as a smartass, writer, weight-loss inspiration, chronic headache sufferer, and overall nice person (who is silently judging you). She does this at JennetteFulda.com now, but you can still have fun perusing her past here.

Disclaimer: I am not responsible for keyboards ruined by coffee spit-takes or forehead wrinkles caused by deep thought.

The Making of CHOCOLATE & VICODIN
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