When I buy a new car next spring, it’s occurred to me that I won’t have to buy a fat person car! I’ll still be overweight then, probably still in ‘obese’ territory, but I don’t think my big butt and gut are going to cause the problems they previously did when seeing how well a car ‘fit’ me.
Right now I have a 1994 Oldsmobile Cutless Cierra, which is a damn fine fat person car. It features bench seats, so there is no spillover. My ass is not intimately acquainted with the gear shifter as it was in my brother’s little Saturn. The Cutless Cierra also provides ample space between your seat and the steering wheel, leaving plenty of room for my tree trunk legs underneath, though occasionally my belly did brush up against the bottom of the wheel.
The Oldsmobile also has really long seatbelts. Even when I was 372 pounds and wearing my bulky winter coat, I could buckle my safety belt with no problems, which was not always the case in some of my friends’ cars. It’s not only embarrassing when you can’t buckle your seatbelt, it could be a fatal health hazard, especially considering the way some of my friends drive. Memo to car companies: Your customers are getting fatter. Stop skimping on the seatbelt material.
While I love my Cutless Cierra and all it has done for me in the past 5 years, I am ready to move onto a slightly smaller and more fuel efficient vehicle. I get about 22 or 23 miles per gallon in the city, which is not bad, but not the best mileage. I believe my brother’s before-mentioned Saturn gets something in the 30’s. I have to wonder if my gas mileage has improved now that I weigh over a hundred pounds less. It must have because I think the reason the Oldsmobile’s mileage is only mediocre is because it’s a big car. You could fit a body in the trunk.
And I have.
A live body, of course. I got my brother to crawl in there once to fix the stereo speaker wire. I was really tempted to slam the trunk closed on him for a laugh, but resisted the urge. I’m such a good sister.