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Lack of Vanity

Maybe if I were vain I would have lost weight sooner.

Unfortunately (or fortunately?) I’ve never been obsessed with my looks. I don’t wear make-up, I don’t shave my legs, and I barely look in the mirror before I leave. Maybe this is also partly effect as well as cause. At 300+ pounds is anyone really going to give a shit if I have hairy legs or not?

Growing up I never weighed myself. I was completely unaware of what I weighed at any time, which probably contributed to my inability to realize when I was gaining weight. Maybe if I was a Narcissus I would have paid more attention to my exterior and made changes to correct what I saw as flaws.

But I’ve always been more focused on my internal life, on my thoughts and observations, and not on making myself look hot. Of course I knew I was overweight. I wanted to be thin, to wear the short skirts and the high boots. It just wasn’t my major preoccupation in life. Maybe if I were vain I would have been scared enough and motivated enough to exercise more than once a month.

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1 Comment

Alecia • August 2, 2009 at 3:23 am

It’s kinda crazy…I’m just the opposite. Always wear make-up and try to “look my best”. I think I may be overly obsessive to compensate for my weight. All it makes me is the girl that people describe as “having such a pretty face.”95 lbs to go til my body matches!!


Comments are now closed on all PastaQueen entries. The blog is an archive only so I don't have to deal with spammers. For fresh discussions please visit my new blog at JennetteFulda.com.

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Jennette Fulda tells stories to the Internet about her life as a smartass, writer, weight-loss inspiration, chronic headache sufferer, and overall nice person (who is silently judging you). She does this at JennetteFulda.com now, but you can still have fun perusing her past here.

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