Tag: ‘weight loss’
January 25, 2007 at 10:20 am
As far as weight loss is concerned, I feel like I have a job where I’ve been told I have to work longer hours for half the pay. Back in the beginning, I could do some walking and eat pretty well and lose 2 or 3 pounds a week. Now I have to run several days a week, do my Pilates, and watch what I eat carefully in the hopes of losing a pound or half a pound a week. It doesn’t seem fair. I’ve entered a phase of where I have to work harder for less results.
The motivations are slightly less too since my weight loss from here on out is mostly for vanity and not health. I’m sure there will be some health benefits from losing the final 30 pounds, but I’m not concerned about suffocating in the night from sleep apnea anymore. I’m not worried that death’s carriage is going to make a stop by my apartment door like an Emily Dickenson poem.
Don’t worry, I’m still going to work towards goal. It’s [...]
January 15, 2007 at 9:40 am
Today’s my two year fat-iversary. It was back on January 15, 2005, that I started losing weight for real after more false starts than a spooked horse at the Kentucky Derby. Strangely, I noticed I have the same fat-iversary as Diet Girl, but then decided that’s not so weird considering how many people go on diets in January.
When I started, I was hoping to reach goal in two years. We’re a bit behind on that. I might be dieting, but losing 200 pounds in 2 years was biting off more than I could chew. At the time two years seemed like forever and a day, so I couldn’t bring myself to set goal for any longer. Here’s a chart of my losses, the red line being the trajectory for hitting goal on time. Click on it for the bigger version:
Through April I was outpacing the red goal line, thinking this would be easy peasy. Then I started keeping pace with it, but by June of 2006 I’d crossed over to the other side of the [...]
January 11, 2007 at 11:05 am
I saw a little questionnaire over at A Smaller Target today and thought I’d tackle it since I’ve gotten some questions on this topic lately.
1) Do you feel that you (the person, soul, who you are) has changed since you have lost weight?
Yes. Which is funny because when I started this whole thing I was sure I would be telling people that I was still the same person, just thinner, and they were all jerkfaces for judging me because of my weight. People who discriminate against you because of your weight are still jerkfaces, but I’m not the same person I was 180 pounds ago. I’m more confident and willing to interact with the world. This is partly because I know I look better and know people will react more positively to me because of that, but partly because I feel a lot of pride and power from accomplishing such a huge task and taking control of my life. I feel like I’m driving now, not just sitting in the back seat of a [...]
January 5, 2007 at 10:48 am
I would never have consciously chosen to become morbidly obese, just as I would never fling myself into the path of a speeding Volkswagon or inject myself with malignant cancer cells. We don’t get to chose the hardships life sets in our path, yet there is a lot be learned from surviving them. In my case, it’s given me a great sense of perspective.
After I lost about 100 pounds, I was still 100 pounds away from my goal and still very much obese. Yet I felt like a superstar in the movie of my life. Ironic, since the last time I weighed that much I’d wanted to toss paint on all the mirrors of the world. Now I would check myself out in the mirror in the ladies room, turn to the left, turn to the right, strike a pose and think “I look so cute!” The last time I weighed that much I’d speedwalk past mirrors like The Flash and think “I’m so fat!” Same size, different attitude. I’d lost 100 pounds, I deserved [...]
December 30, 2006 at 10:10 am
The secret to weight loss – chocolate covered cherries and snickerdoodles. You heard it here first. Oh, maybe all that running and bending my body like a pretzel helped too.
Two nights ago I dreamt I was fat again, complete with butt shelf. My butt used to stick out so far you could rest a set of Encyclopedia Britannica’s on it. I looked as fat as I had been when I weighed 300, but in the dream I knew I still weighed 195. I’d only hallucinated all the body changes over the past two years, like I was wrapped in a fairy glamour that had finally worn off. I looked at myself in the mirror to see that my clothes were wrinkled and ill-fitting. I don’t ever want to go back there. I don’t ever want those clothes to fit again.