Indy 500 Qualifying Day: I evidently don’t need any qualifications

In one of those mix-ups that occasionally happens, the Indianapolis Motor Speedway mistook me for someone of importance. Before they could discover their error, I snatched up their offer for media credentials. (I love the word “credentials.” I have credentials! I’m credentialed!) That’s how I found myself wandering around the speedway last Saturday, drinking as much free Coke Zero as my bladder could hold.

First, I picked up my badge and pin from the administration office. I also grabbed a handy spotter’s guide, which is like a birdspotter’s guide, if birds had corporate logos. (Hey birds, smarten up and you can trade your nappy nests for super sweet birdhouses!) I also got a parking sticker that got me a prime space only a quarter of a mile away from the stands instead of miles away from the stands like everyone else.

I headed into the garage area, where I saw a guy in an Herbalife jumpsuit smoking a cigarette. Ha! Didn’t score a picture of that though. I did manage to hone in on a source [...]

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