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Waiter, there’s a tail in my soup

“Um, PastaQueen. What did you order?” my friend C. asked as she flipped through the menu trying to make a decision before the waitress came back for a third time.

“The Ouch-cinch-wands soup,” I told her as I tried to pronounce the words “Ochsenschwanz Suppe” off the menu at the German restaurant we were eating at before attending a concert across the street. She flipped through the menu and read the description. “Uh, did you see what’s in that?” she said as though she were warning me that the waiter had spit in my soup. “There’s …ox tail.”

“I know! That must be why they put the port wine in it too!” I replied.

“Ox tail?” our friend K. said from across the table. “Wow, do you think it’ll be served with a big, stalk of hair sticking up, like a fan?”

“I don’t know, I’ve never had ox tail before. That’s why I’m trying it.” After seeing the looks of horror on my friends’ faces, I realized that after tasting so many new fruits and vegetables in my [...]

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Man looking into telescope

Jennette Fulda tells stories to the Internet about her life as a smartass, writer, weight-loss inspiration, chronic headache sufferer, and overall nice person (who is silently judging you). She does this at JenFul now, but you can still have fun perusing her past here.

Disclaimer: I am not responsible for keyboards ruined by coffee spit-takes or forehead wrinkles caused by deep thought.

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