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Lunch time

It was 12:38 and I wasn’t starving, shocking me enough to interrupt my typing. I double checked the clock in my system tray. How bizarre, I thought. I always get hungry by noon. Before I could blame one of my medications for lack of appetite, I realized there was an answer that didn’t involve reuptake inhibitors.

It was Daylight Saving Time.

While my computer clock said it was 12:38, my body clock said it was 11:38, so I got up to eat both earlier and later than usual. It happened again that evening after my short-term memory had cleared my earlier realization and I momentarily was amazed that I hadn’t eaten anything by 7pm.

These tricks with time made me realize how linked my eating is to the clock. I eat breakfast at around 7:30. I have a mid-morning snack, but don’t eat lunch until noon. Then there is the afternoon snack and dinner right when I get home. It’s not timed to the second, but I eat on a regular schedule. I wasn’t entirely conscious of it […]

Why diet pills are not the answer (unless they cure your headache)

I’m glad my headache doctor opens at seven o’clock in the morning, because no one is awake to see me entering his office. I’m not ashamed to be seeing a neurologist, however he works in a large medical complex occupied mainly by another unrelated practice. That is the reason, and I swear the ONLY reason, I was entering a building Wednesday morning labeled, “St. Censored-For-My-Privacy’s Bariatric Weight Loss Center.” I feel paranoid visiting that complex, because I know if someone were to snap a photo of me entering the front door for the interwebs, I would be accused of being a big (skinny) fraud. I only have the most recent issue of Neurology Now with Morgan Fairchild on the cover that I stole from his office to prove where I really was.

I was at the doctor because all the IV treatments and medications we’ve tried lately haven’t done anything except make me poorer. I could have paid off my car by now with the money I’ve spent. So, we’re adjusting my medications again, which means […]

The price of milk

One way to make yourself feel bad for ever being obese is to watch a Bill Moyers TV report about hunger in America. I was on the couch last night debating whether to have another sugar-free pudding cup when a story came on about people who live on food stamps and are still going hungry. The cost of food is rising across the world, food pantries are getting less donations, and the money doesn’t stretch as far, so there are people on disability, social security, or who are out of work who have to skip meals. It made me lose my appetite. I used to eat entire boxes of cookies, and one of these poor people on the TV only had half a green pepper in her fridge.

The story said that over the past year the price of milk has increased by 26%, eggs by 24%, and bread by 13%. I have to admit, I hadn’t noticed this because I don’t pay much attention to prices at the grocery store. I always calculate which brand […]

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Jennette Fulda tells stories to the Internet about her life as a smartass, writer, weight-loss inspiration, chronic headache sufferer, and overall nice person (who is silently judging you). She does this at JenFul now, but you can still have fun perusing her past here.

Disclaimer: I am not responsible for keyboards ruined by coffee spit-takes or forehead wrinkles caused by deep thought.

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