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If you’re happy and you know it, lose some weight

I’ve lost weight this week even though I haven’t really been trying to (any more than I ever am). Weight loss used to be my biggest hobby, and now it’s something I do when I get around to it, like the laundry. It’s still on my mind, but sometimes the pounds pile up rather high before I can knock them off again, leading me to a life of weight maintenance instead of weight loss. My loss happened despite eating pizza two out of the last three days too. Go figure.

I’ve been trying to figure out what exactly I did so I can keep on doing it. All I can guess is that I’ve kept my self happily distracted the past week with work, TV, Internet surfing, and socializing. The socializing included pizza and cake though, so I don’t know how that figures in. I’ve felt happier and bouncier ever since the sun returned to Indiana. The secret to weight loss might be happiness. I know people tend to believe weight loss leads to happiness, but [...]

Mood swings

I like the days when it is sunny outside and my kitties cuddle me and my microwave lunch has a tasty peach dessert (which I thought was an apple dessert until I read the package) and I’m excited about my job and there is good TV on.

I don’t like the days when it is rainy outside and my cats have tufts of hair in their mouths and blood on their noses and lunch is abandoned for the donuts in the break room and my job is stressful and I have to wait until tomorrow to download Battlestar Galactica.

Most frustratingly, I don’t get to control the days. I cannot make it rain or shine. I cannot make my cats love each other. I cannot make myself hate sugar and chocolate. I don’t control the TV schedule or my workplace in a bad economy. I can’t do much to mediate my moods, other than take my pills and exercise and avoid all those things the doctors told me to avoid, like caffeine, liquor, and staying up late, [...]

There’s a direct correlation

Living in a happier reality (with sex orgies)

When Carla told me she wasn’t going to apply to the geek summer camp I’d attended the summer before senior year because she’d heard it was a drugged-out sex orgy, I was befuddled. The only sex I remembered was between the squirrels.

“Where did you hear this?” I asked her.

“From George Johnson.”

And that explained it. George Johnson appeared to live in our universe, but actually existed in a parallel dimension where cars were Shinier! and girls were Prettier! than they appeared to those of us in this world. George Johnson never let reality get in the way of a good story, or he might have just seen reality bigger and brighter than the rest of us. (Or there might have actually been secret sex parties going on in the bushes that I was not invited to.)

However, George Johnson seemed to be pretty damn happy in his shinier, prettier, world, even if it wasn’t the reality that the rest of us were living in. I was thinking of him when I was sent this article on low [...]

Weighing in on November

November was so insane that I forgot to weigh in on it until six days into December. Oops! And what a wacky month it was. First I discovered the common cold was the secret to losing those last two hundred pounds. Then I discovered the stress of which I cannot speak was a good way to gain back five. Then there was Thanksgiving. The net result? In November I lost and then regained about ten pounds. I’ve never ridden a roller coaster like that without wearing a seatbelt.

During the time I was excreting half my bodily fluids out my nose, I went four days without exercising, the longest period of non-activity I’ve experienced since the days when I had to rock back and forth to heave myself off the couch. When I was stressed, I ate about three pints of ice cream, the most dairy I’ve eaten in a week since I was breastfeeding. I didn’t eat much for Thanksgiving dinner, but made up for it during dessert by devouring several helpings of [...]

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Jennette Fulda tells stories to the Internet about her life as a smartass, writer, weight-loss inspiration, chronic headache sufferer, and overall nice person (who is silently judging you). She does this at JenFul now, but you can still have fun perusing her past here.

Disclaimer: I am not responsible for keyboards ruined by coffee spit-takes or forehead wrinkles caused by deep thought.

Life in Quarantine for Ebola Exposure: 21 Days of Fear and Loathing - NYTimes.com
I tend to stay at home a lot, but 21 days stuck in my apartment would drive me crazy.

Buy Experiences, Not Things - The Atlantic
Money can buy happiness if you spend it on experiences, not things.

The Man Who Smuggles Trader Joe’s into Canada
I'd heard of Pirate Joe's before but this article gives a real in-depth look at it.

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