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Happy Mother’s Day, Mom!

Hey, Mom! I am wishing you a happy Mother’s Day on my blog so I can post a picture of this:

This is your Mother’s Day card! You can tell because it’s in a pretty pink envelope. Which is still in my possession. It would be sitting in your mailbox in Indianapolis if I had paid attention to any of the junk mail advertisements I received in the past few weeks that explicitly stated that Mother’s Day was this weekend. However, I have a highly attuned ability to filter out most advertising, so I thought Mother’s Day was NEXT weekend. But really, isn’t Mother’s Day EVERY day? Of course it is. Which is why you will not be upset when I pop this in the mailbox this evening and you get it on Tuesday. (Be swift, United States postal service. Be swift!)

Love you!

Giving thanks for hyperlinking

In fifth grade I won a Christmas greeting card contest. I don’t remember what I drew, but I sketched something with my crayons and a week later I was called to the art teacher’s office to take a photo with my nice big trophy. I beat out all the other kids in the school district, including Jennifer, who was the most talented artist in my class. It was nice revenge because Jennifer had recently won the Young Author’s contest with her picture book. I had written a 20-page tome about the forbidden friendship between a fox and a bunny rabbit and won bupkis. I like to think the universe got its wires crossed and I ended up with her art trophy and she ended up with a certificate or plaque or whatever they gave the Young Author’s winner.

If you too have a desire to design greeting cards, you should enter Hallmark’s your Greeting Card Competition. They won’t give you a trophy, but they will give you $250 if you are one of the ten finalists. [...]

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Man looking into telescope

Jennette Fulda tells stories to the Internet about her life as a smartass, writer, weight-loss inspiration, chronic headache sufferer, and overall nice person (who is silently judging you). She does this at JenFul now, but you can still have fun perusing her past here.

Disclaimer: I am not responsible for keyboards ruined by coffee spit-takes or forehead wrinkles caused by deep thought.

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