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Do not ride the Megabus (triple exclamation point extremely necessary)!!!

This is what the Megabus looks like after it has been set on fire:

No, I did not set it ablaze, but after my recent experiences I would not blame anyone who did. As with most disaster victims, I had no idea what was going on until it was over. I was confused when the Megabus driver pulled over to the Kankakee rest area on northbound I-65, because there were no scheduled stops between Indianapolis and Chicago. Yes, the construction had forced us into one lane and an accident in that one lane had turned the freeway into a linear parking lot for an hour, but we’d finally gotten past the congestion. Why were we still traveling at 25mph?

When we pulled into the parking lot and the driver dove for the fire extinguisher under the front seat, I began to realize something was wrong. Then he opened the door and white smoke started to billow in, at which time I almost pissed myself and decided I needed that rest stop after all. I grabbed my backpack [...]

European travel journal – Day 10: A plane, a train, a bus and an automobile

The plane dipped up and then down like the Thunder Run roller coaster at Kentucky Kingdom. I pulled down the arm rest by the empty seat next to me so I could grip it tightly. Whatever happens will happen I told myself as I breathed deeply in and out. You are not driving the plane. You are not creating the winds. It is out of your control. The plane jittered and bounced as it hit the runway. Then it swerved slightly to left and right. If we crash into a ball of flames at the end of the runway, at least I’ll have seen Europe. And then the plane stopped and there was silence broken by the sound of the whole plane applauding. “As you can tell, we have most definitely landed,” the copilot announced over the intercom and finally I breathed out and was relieved to be back on the ground again in the US of A.

Any complaints I might have about spending 21 hours traveling are dampened by the knowledge that 100 [...]

Off to BlogHer!

I’m leaving for the BlogHer conference in Chicago today. As some of you recommended, I checked into the MegaBus service and was able to get a round trip fare from Indianapolis to Chicago for $9.50. No, I did not misplace the decimal. No, I don’t know how they stay in business. They’re basically only asking me to buy 3 gallons of gas for them. I wouldn’t be surprised if they ask me to swallow a balloon of unidentified white powder before getting on board and then make me use the facilities before they give me my luggage back. That or they’re going to sell me into sex slavery in Taiwan. If I go missing, that’s where you should start looking for me. How do you say “Don’t stick that up there” in Taiwanese?

The other odd thing is that I get on board at some random street corner in downtown Indianapolis. They don’t use the bus station, nor do they use tickets. You just reserve a spot online and bring your receipt with the confirmation number. [...]

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Man looking into telescope

Jennette Fulda tells stories to the Internet about her life as a smartass, writer, weight-loss inspiration, chronic headache sufferer, and overall nice person (who is silently judging you). She does this at JenFul now, but you can still have fun perusing her past here.

Disclaimer: I am not responsible for keyboards ruined by coffee spit-takes or forehead wrinkles caused by deep thought.

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