March 12, 2008 at 8:17 am
While there are some days when I want to drive to Marsh and stuff an entire stuffed-crust pizza in my mouth, there are also days when I come home wishing I wanted to binge but have to admit I’m just not feeling it. Last night was one of those nights. I was tired from work. I went out of my way to get diet cat food at PetSmart, and then got stuck in traffic for 20 minutes because a Thunderbird stalled in the left lane of traffic. My head still hurts a little all the time. I had no energy.
In the car and on the couch, my thoughts kept coming back to, “What can I eat to make myself feel better?” I think I just do that out of habit though. There wasn’t anything I was craving. I didn’t feel like chocolate donuts. I nixed Snickerdoodles. I thought about eating a lot of baked apple oatmeal, but eh, it didn’t sound right. When I listened to my body, I realized I didn’t even feel hungry, [...]
February 29, 2008 at 7:16 am
Sometimes healthy living is so easy for me. I eat my snacks at the scheduled hours. I have a salad for dinner and genuinely enjoy it. I walk past boxes of Girl Scout cookies in the office kitchen without reaching my hand out to grab a bite and it’s not hard at all. Then there are nights when I’m sitting in the Marsh parking lot at 8:00 at night thinking, “There is something seriously wrong with me.” Because it is not normal to eat a box of ice cream sandwiches, two donuts, God-only-knows-how-many bowls of oatmeal, and a lot of other stuff I can’t remember two weeks later, and still want to drive to the grocery store to buy a stuffed-crust pizza.
Thankfully, it’s been so long since I bought a Tombstone stuffed-crust pizza that they seem to have stopped making them, or my Marsh just doesn’t stock them, so that was one small chip of the iceberg my personal Titanic avoided. I did wander around the freezer section for literally 15 minutes trying to decide [...]
February 24, 2008 at 5:02 pm
It’s been a whole year since I became half of myself! While the last couple months have been tough – changing jobs, fighting the winter blahs, and experiencing train-gain – I can still stand naked on that scale in the morning and weigh-in under 186. I only ask that you respect my modesty and not actually imagine me standing naked on the scale in the morning.
Monday night, Michael Pollan will be speaking at Butler University here in Indianapolis. Pollen wrote The Omnivore’s Dilemma: A Natural History of Four Meals and recently released In Defense of Food: An Eater’s Manifesto which are all about food, which you should all know I am a fan of. I had the full intention of reading these books before attending the lecture tomorrow night, but unfortunately this requires actually scanning the words with my eyes as I flip pages and not just setting the book on the shelf I have entirely dedicated to my library books. (Confession: I am the world’s slowest reader.) So, if anyone actually has read these [...]
November 22, 2007 at 8:04 am
I was going to make some pumpkin bread to bring to Thanksgiving dinner. I copied the recipe down by hand from my mother’s Betty Crocker cookbook which is baptized in shortening splatters. I was looking forward to ridding myself of the four pounds of pumpkin puree in my freezer. Last week I even checked to make sure I had enough flour in the cupboard.
Then last night I looked at my dirty dishes in the sink and I didn’t want to wash them. And I thought about driving to the grocery on Thanksgiving Eve to buy shortening and shuddered. But mostly I knew that if I baked a loaf of pumpkin bread, I would eat half a loaf of pumpkin bread before Thursday morning. I would tell myself not to. I’d believe that I could restrain myself. But who am I kidding? If I bake a loaf of pumpkin bread I’m going to eat half of it in a day. That’s just who I am.
So I put away the recipe and stuffed the thawed pumpkin back [...]
June 18, 2007 at 9:27 am
If I owned a cosmic eraser I think I’d use it to rub last Saturday out of existence. For some reason I decided I needed to clean out my refrigerator using my mouth. I ate. A lot. For no real reason. Which is odd, because I was certainly under more stress earlier in the week and didn’t eat a whole bowl of pudding then. But along came the weekend and the part of my brain that regulates my eating decided to check out for a day at the beach. I was so full after “lunch” that I took a two and half hour nap. I haven’t done that since college when my roommate and I had competitive napping sessions to see who could be the most unproductive for the longest amount of time.
But, that was Saturday, and life goes on. I did not instantly regain 190 pounds. My clothes still fit. As the alcoholics say, I can only make the next best choice. On the positive side, at least when I binge these days it’s [...]