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Some things were not meant to be pink

I want to say that I support breast cancer research and admire anyone who has had to deal with that disease. Cancer is bad. Fighting it is good. However, every time I drive by this display on Franklin Street, I feel like the pink thing has gone way too far:

Sponsored by Pepto Bismol?

Think pink

Pink pumpkins? My drive-by photography doesn’t quite capture the grossness of these gourds. Closeup they look like they were dipped in a vat of Pepto Bismol or coated in pink nail polish, neither of which sounds delectable to me. They are the very definition of BLECH. Pink is nature’s way of saying, “DANGER! Do not eat!” Pink pumpkins are as unnatural as a sharktopus.

In addition, the witch in the top photo was probably strung up to make it appear like she’s flying, but it actually looks like she was hanged by Puritans for practicing her dark arts.

To sum up, this yard display does not get me fired up about either Breast Cancer Awareness month nor Halloween. It does get me excited about using my accelerator pedal to drive away. Any hate mail letting me know how evil I am for making fun of anything even tangentially cancer-related can be sent to thisaddressdoesnotexist@pastaqueen.com

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[...] This is really cracking me up. I feel so sorry for that poor hanging witch. Stolen from the ever lovely PastaQueen [...]

JenFul » In the pink, and not in a good way · October 23, 2012 at 7:30 am

[...] I blogged about two years ago, there is a local business that likes to mix Halloween and Breast Cancer Awareness Month in hideous [...]

30 Comments

Jen • October 13, 2010 at 10:29 am

At least they didn’t paint the pumpkins to look like boobs or show the witch getting a mammogram!

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Shannon • October 13, 2010 at 11:33 am

Now that you live in Chapel Hill, you HAVE to do Halloween night on Franklin St. They block off a couple blocks and everyone dresses up (mostly college kids) and wanders around looking at each other. There are some GREAT costumes but mostly it is just an amazing people watching event. It’s fun, and you should do it at least once in your life.

Also, the witch does look strung up, not flying. They should fix that.

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Kara • October 13, 2010 at 11:53 am

Ok, that’s the worst I’ve seen so far. Wow.

I’m being a “pink” grinch this year. About the time I saw pink potato chips at the grocery store I lost any pink spirit. It’s become nothing more than another marketing tactic that companies use to guilt you into buying their products.

Besides where are the ribbons/months/days for my friend dying of pancreas cancer or my father who died of lung/bone cancer or the thousands of other people with other forms of cancer?

Bah humbug. Down with the pink.

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Lisa • October 13, 2010 at 12:45 pm

BIZARRE! I want orange pumpkins, thank you!

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Peter • October 13, 2010 at 1:19 pm

I have to disagree; a “sharktopus” IS a quite natural creature, and I saw a documentary on SyFy that proved it. The sharktopus is a villainous sea creature, known for tossing cars about and devouring unsuspecting beach volleyball participants. It’s a serious problem.

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Linda • October 13, 2010 at 1:21 pm

I’m with you. I’ve heard more quilters say, “Oh, my friend has breast cancer. I’m making her a pink quilt.” Well, dear, I don’t think your friend needs to be made any more aware of breast cancer than she already is. What further annoys me is the fact that manufacturers jump on the pink bandwagon by coloring everything from machinery to emery boards pink, but there’s no guarantee that they’re actually donating anything of the purchase price to cancer research–or any other worthy cause for that matter! Bring back Octobers with orange and black!

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Jackie • October 13, 2010 at 1:48 pm

I agree with you. That display is hideous. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing when I drove past it on Monday. Fortunately I don’t have to drive along that stretch of road very often as I have other routes to reach my dear friends “Trader Joe’s” and “Whole Foods”!

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Julie • October 13, 2010 at 2:02 pm

I agree. My Mom was a breast cancer survivor, but this pink thing has gone WAY too far.

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Ellen • October 13, 2010 at 2:07 pm

That’s crazy, but I think I can top it. The other day I was walking home from a concert and I saw a GARBAGE TRUCK with a breast cancer slogan and a pink ribbon painted on the side. I don’t have breast cancer, but I have friends whose lives have been affected by it, and I don’t think any of them want the “honor” of a stinking garbage truck dedicated to their cause!

I only wish I had taken a photo…

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Becca • October 13, 2010 at 2:52 pm

I think the pumpkins look like a bunch of disembodied boobies!!

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Debbi Does Dinner Healthy • October 13, 2010 at 3:31 pm

HaHa, I’m with Becca above, I thought maybe they represented boobs!

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Elaine • October 13, 2010 at 3:45 pm

Hear, hear! I agree with Kara above.

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polli • October 13, 2010 at 5:33 pm

Totally agree. Kara, I’m absolutely with you. Family and good friends have fought the fight, and I support them, but I am just really over this pink business. I think it’s become crass, actually. I find myself purposely avoiding those things, even, which I’m sure is NOT the intended consequence, but I get grinchier and grinchier every year!

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megs • October 13, 2010 at 5:46 pm

Hilarious post!

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Debby • October 13, 2010 at 7:20 pm

My life partner is both a breast cancer and colon cancer survivor, and even she thinks the pink pumpkins are just disgusting looking. We want some orange!

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Anya • October 13, 2010 at 9:22 pm

I usually don’t comment on blogs much but I have to say…. having just moved into Sunstone, this display is how I know where to turn!!! I would be lost without it, hideous as it is.

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PastaQueen • October 13, 2010 at 9:29 pm

@Anya – The house at the very end of the street I used to live would put up tons of bright and tacky Christmas lights. It caused some traffic problems, but it also made it really easy to know where to turn :)

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Michelle • October 13, 2010 at 10:21 pm

You are so funny.

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Jack • October 13, 2010 at 11:45 pm

That’s wacked. I think “Save The TaTas” is all you need to say for breast cancer support.

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Rebecca Hoover • October 14, 2010 at 12:11 am

Amen Sister!!

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Lanie • October 14, 2010 at 8:41 am

I totally support the idea of the witch mammogram scene!

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goosh • October 14, 2010 at 9:20 pm

@Linda – I don’t know your quilting friends but I would love it if someone made me a pink quilt. I have never, for one single second, forgotten I have breast cancer, so it would not be a “reminder” that I’m fighting a disease. Rather, it would be a reminder that I am not alone in my fight. A warm quilt from someone who loves me would totally make my day.
Now, the pink pumpkins? Ewwww!

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Jamie • October 15, 2010 at 11:03 am

My mom died of Breast Cancer in dec 2007, and I now cringe every october. There are constant reminders everywhere about this horrible disease, and honestly to me it feels more like we are celebrating it then anything else.

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Linda • October 15, 2010 at 12:05 pm

Oh my the pink pumpkins are sooo ugly. It would have been much better if they just carved out a pink ribbon. But painting the hole pumpkin pink is a horrible idea.

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nixpix • October 16, 2010 at 7:06 pm

I loved this post!! I was at the grocery store this morning and they had some kind of pink food on display (I don’t even remember what it was, but it was something not normally pink) and I remember thinking, I use to like pink, but now I almost hate it. I am so sick of this whole pink cancer thing. Let’s be real, we all know people who have had breast cancer….but this getting to be obnoxious.
Then I came home and just by chance came across your blog. It has become a fad/marketing pitch….and its getting old!

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Anna • October 18, 2010 at 5:56 am

It’s called ‘pinkwashing’ (yep, there is a word out there for everything)…it actually seems to have taken over ‘greenwashing’ and is getting quite irritating.

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Kelly • October 24, 2010 at 11:30 pm

I am laughing at this now, because I actually drove by this today! I saw it, and I was like “I know someone posted a pic of something like this recently…” but I couldn’t remember where I’d seen it, and I was thinking that maybe a bunch of Coldwell Banker offices do it. But no, I drove by that same one, when my husband was showing me around some of his old haunts in Chapel Hill on our way back to Baltimore from a wedding in Winston-Salem. That lovely display is just a couple of moments from his old apartment complex (Eastridge, or something like that).

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Dana • October 28, 2010 at 9:12 pm

Breast cancer has such a high survival rate per number of incidences. I know some people do get really sick and die from it, but most of the people (not just women btw) who catch it will live for longer than five years. I really think the only reason anyone “raises awareness” about it is they’re getting grumpy about all the boobies disappearing when they really wanted to be raising, erm, something else.

To which I say: Get over it.

Lung cancer kills more women per number of diagnosed cases than breast cancer does. But nobody gets horny from an air bag embedded in your chest cavity. Ovarian cancer kills more women per number of diagnosed cases and they don’t even do the blood test as a regular screening procedure that would catch it early. But ew, who wants to be reminded of pregnancy and PMS.

The other day I bought a copy of Mother Earth News and I kid you not, there was this seller of animal feed advertising in said issue, and THEY SOLD THEIR CRITTER CHOW IN PINK BAGS. Chicken feed. Horse feed. Goat feed. In pink bags. I can’t decide whether this is a cheap shot along the lines of the unproven (OK, false) notion that you get breast cancer from eating meat, or what. All I know is I want it to go away.

And if you thought that was a sunny walk in the park, you should read Barbara Ehrenreich’s take on the whole “think pink” thing. If you liked her book Nickeled and Dimed, you’ll love her breast cancer stuff.

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Comments are now closed on all PastaQueen entries. The blog is an archive only so I don't have to deal with spammers. For fresh discussions please visit my new blog JenFul.

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Jennette Fulda tells stories to the Internet about her life as a smartass, writer, weight-loss inspiration, chronic headache sufferer, and overall nice person (who is silently judging you). She does this at JenFul now, but you can still have fun perusing her past here.

Disclaimer: I am not responsible for keyboards ruined by coffee spit-takes or forehead wrinkles caused by deep thought.

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