July 29, 2009 at 9:36 am
When I saw the cannoli on the discarded room service tray, I knew it would be mine. Oh yes, it would be mine.
The cannoli had no bite marks in its shell, and other than a bit of tomato sauce smeared onto the side, it was in perfect condition. It seemed wrong to let such a fine cannoli go to waste, so I decided to rescue it from its tray outside the hotel room next to mine and give it a home in my stomach. The only obstacle between me and the cannoli was the Shutter Sisters suite, directly across the hall from my room, open all day during the conference I was attending. People came and went from the suite regularly, grabbing free candies and viewing demos of photo editing software. I would have to be discreet, or else I would be caught by any one of a dozen women who knew how to use their digital cameras.
I got my room key out, arranged all my bags on my shoulders carefully, and inserted the key card to open the door. Then I squatted down, reached a long arm out towards the room service tray, snatched the cannoli and bolted into my room. Theft accomplished. Cannoli delicious.
I am a self-confessed cake stealer, so cannoli thieving was probably an inevitable crime to add to my culinary rap sheet. As a way of atoning for my theft, I took a bag of chocolate I had won at one of the vendor booths and placed it on the room service tray as I left for another event. The chocolate was yummy, but I knew if I kept it I would just eat the whole bag and feel bad about it later. When I returned a few hours later, the room service tray was still there, but the chocolate was gone! It appears I was not the only food thief in the Sheraton that night.
It is good to know that if this freelancing thing doesn’t work out and I can’t afford food, all I have to do is roam the hallways of the upscale hotels downtown to scavenge meals off of room service trays. Then on Saturday night, I walked out of my hotel room to see this outside the Shutter Sisters suite:
I let the cookies and wine be. At least I have some restraint.
Earlier: Do not ride the Megabus (triple exclamation point extremely necessary)!!!
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