Comments on: About kids http://pastaqueen.com/blog/2009/02/about-kids/ You'll laugh you ass off. (I did.) Thu, 02 Feb 2012 20:02:58 -0500 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: Jane http://pastaqueen.com/blog/2009/02/about-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-20821 Jane Tue, 10 Feb 2009 05:16:21 +0000 http://pastaqueen.com/blog/?p=1036#comment-20821 @caseykay68 - that is so right! i have children myself and am very happy with that choice. I really hate though the views you read on some bulletin boards by parents telling the childfree by choice "you WILL change your mind"- well no, why should they? and also those by the childfree who trash parents for daring to travel with kids, or take them to supermarkets or restaurants or indeed anywhere. And the prying questions "when are you having kids?" from family, friends or colleagues are so wrong: that is private business, and the questioning can cause real pain to women who desperately want kids and either cannot conceive or have serial miscarriages. @caseykay68 – that is so right! i have children myself and am very happy with that choice. I really hate though the views you read on some bulletin boards by parents telling the childfree by choice “you WILL change your mind”- well no, why should they? and also those by the childfree who trash parents for daring to travel with kids, or take them to supermarkets or restaurants or indeed anywhere. And the prying questions “when are you having kids?” from family, friends or colleagues are so wrong: that is private business, and the questioning can cause real pain to women who desperately want kids and either cannot conceive or have serial miscarriages.

]]> By: caseykay68 http://pastaqueen.com/blog/2009/02/about-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-20820 caseykay68 Tue, 10 Feb 2009 01:31:40 +0000 http://pastaqueen.com/blog/?p=1036#comment-20820 I have to say its good to see "my people" here. I too am 40 and childless by choice as they say. I've never been militant about it...it just wasn't on my to do's and I don't feel that clock ticking. But most people have a hard time understanding that concept...theres always the "well you still can if you want" etc. And mostly I just smile and ignore those comments because its not worth getting into the discussion, its right up there with religion and politics discussions I have to say its good to see “my people” here. I too am 40 and childless by choice as they say. I’ve never been militant about it…it just wasn’t on my to do’s and I don’t feel that clock ticking. But most people have a hard time understanding that concept…theres always the “well you still can if you want” etc. And mostly I just smile and ignore those comments because its not worth getting into the discussion, its right up there with religion and politics discussions

]]> By: cloudy http://pastaqueen.com/blog/2009/02/about-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-20819 cloudy Mon, 09 Feb 2009 16:17:40 +0000 http://pastaqueen.com/blog/?p=1036#comment-20819 I had no idea if I ever wanted kids, but then my Mom died suddenly when I was 32, which swayed me toward putting it on my 5 year plan. I now have the most perfect one year old little boy. I got lucky. Kids are not for everyone. I had no idea if I ever wanted kids, but then my Mom died suddenly when I was 32, which swayed me toward putting it on my 5 year plan. I now have the most perfect one year old little boy. I got lucky. Kids are not for everyone.

]]> By: Doji Bo http://pastaqueen.com/blog/2009/02/about-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-20818 Doji Bo Mon, 09 Feb 2009 15:42:29 +0000 http://pastaqueen.com/blog/?p=1036#comment-20818 I'm fifty and never had kids, and I got a lot of flack in my 30's about "when are you going to get married and have a family?", but I always knew I wasn't the maternal type. Luckily my brother took the pressure off when he got married and they had 2 kids. And I think over time the relatives can see I made the best choice for me. So definitely don't let others pressure you, and do what you think is best for you. Taking care of animals is certainly worthy as well. I have a rescued kitty and that is enough for me. I’m fifty and never had kids, and I got a lot of flack in my 30′s about “when are you going to get married and have a family?”, but I always knew I wasn’t the maternal type. Luckily my brother took the pressure off when he got married and they had 2 kids. And I think over time the relatives can see I made the best choice for me. So definitely don’t let others pressure you, and do what you think is best for you. Taking care of animals is certainly worthy as well. I have a rescued kitty and that is enough for me.

]]> By: Merry http://pastaqueen.com/blog/2009/02/about-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-20817 Merry Mon, 09 Feb 2009 10:34:57 +0000 http://pastaqueen.com/blog/?p=1036#comment-20817 @Shannon - I think that's great if you refer to your cats as your furkids. I don't think people should /assume/ that's why people have pets. I care for my dog; I don't think of her as my child. (And I don't think of myself as my dog's owner, it would be more accurate to say I'm her human.) @Shannon – I think that’s great if you refer to your cats as your furkids. I don’t think people should /assume/ that’s why people have pets.

I care for my dog; I don’t think of her as my child. (And I don’t think of myself as my dog’s owner, it would be more accurate to say I’m her human.)

]]> By: Morgan http://pastaqueen.com/blog/2009/02/about-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-20816 Morgan Mon, 09 Feb 2009 02:21:12 +0000 http://pastaqueen.com/blog/?p=1036#comment-20816 I understand completely. At 26, it seems that every uterus I know besides my own has been occupied by some little bundle of..something. Kids are cute, except when they aren't. And I could understand the passing fancy of wanting to have one. I won't write myself off from motherhood entirely just yet. But as it stands right now, I am a giant toddler with the attention span of a goldfish. That makes breeding seem like a bad plan for me. Also.. the entire notion of gestation is really really upsetting. Call it natural and beautiful all you want... but essentially pregnancy and childbirth are frightening. I understand completely. At 26, it seems that every uterus I know besides my own has been occupied by some little bundle of..something. Kids are cute, except when they aren’t. And I could understand the passing fancy of wanting to have one. I won’t write myself off from motherhood entirely just yet. But as it stands right now, I am a giant toddler with the attention span of a goldfish. That makes breeding seem like a bad plan for me. Also.. the entire notion of gestation is really really upsetting. Call it natural and beautiful all you want… but essentially pregnancy and childbirth are frightening.

]]> By: brass.lady http://pastaqueen.com/blog/2009/02/about-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-20815 brass.lady Mon, 09 Feb 2009 02:20:54 +0000 http://pastaqueen.com/blog/?p=1036#comment-20815 I never really wanted children until I met my hubby...and although I cannot have children right now--I am trying to finish my PhD--I will definitely want to have HIS children. You might change your mind when you meet THE one! I never really wanted children until I met my hubby…and although I cannot have children right now–I am trying to finish my PhD–I will definitely want to have HIS children. You might change your mind when you meet THE one!

]]> By: alisha http://pastaqueen.com/blog/2009/02/about-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-20814 alisha Sun, 08 Feb 2009 20:44:03 +0000 http://pastaqueen.com/blog/?p=1036#comment-20814 I AM ALMOST 37 I GOT MARRIED WHEN I WAS 23 ALMOST 24 TO MY HIGHSCHOOL SWEETHEART. WE WERE MARRIED ALMOST 6 YEARS WHEN WE HAD OUR SON. I HAD FIBROIDS THAT WERE DISCOVERED DURING A ROUTINE EXAMINE. SO I HAD TO HAVE SURGERY, FERTILITY DRUGS AND KNEW THAT IF I COULD HAVE ONE CHILD HE WOULD BE ALL I COULD HAVE. UNTIL I GOT "SICK" I FIGURED I WOULD BE IN MY 30S WHEN I HAD A CHILD. I ENJOYED CHILDREN, BUT I WORKED, HAD A LIFE SO TO SPEAK. I WAS CONTENT. SO WAS MY HUSBAND. UNTIL I HAD TO HAVE A CHILD THEN - OR- NOT SITUATION I HADNT REALLY CONSIDERED IT. I LOVE MY SON WOULDNT CHANGE ANYTHING IN THE WORLD ABOUT HIM. BUT I WOULD LIKE TO ADOPT SOMEDAY. BUT THE CLOCK IS TICKING ON THAT AS WELL, SINCE I AM HEADING TOWARD 40 AND IT IS SO EXPENSIVE AND THE ECONOMY ETC. WHO KNOWS. BUT WITH ONE CHILD , IT IS NOT "AS BAD" AS HAVING NO CHILDREN AND THE STIGMA FROM THAT. BUT IT HAS ITS COMMENTS. OH, WHY NOT HAVE MORE. BLAH BLAH. I USED TO FEEL LESS COMPLETE AT TIMES BECAUSE OF ONLY HAVING ONE. NOW, I DONT CARE WHAT PEOPLE THINK, SAY OR COMMENT. ITS NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS. IF YOU HAVE BABIES, WONDERFUL, IF YOU DONT HAVE BABIES , WONDERFUL, JUST BE YOU AND BE HAPPY. YOU SOUND HAPPY WITHOUT CHILDREN. AND BUSY, AND CONTENT. TIME WILL TELL IF YOU CHANGE. I AM ALMOST 37 I GOT MARRIED WHEN I WAS 23 ALMOST 24 TO MY HIGHSCHOOL SWEETHEART. WE WERE MARRIED ALMOST 6 YEARS WHEN WE HAD OUR SON. I HAD FIBROIDS THAT WERE DISCOVERED DURING A ROUTINE EXAMINE. SO I HAD TO HAVE SURGERY, FERTILITY DRUGS AND KNEW THAT IF I COULD HAVE ONE CHILD HE WOULD BE ALL I COULD HAVE. UNTIL I GOT “SICK” I FIGURED I WOULD BE IN MY 30S WHEN I HAD A CHILD. I ENJOYED CHILDREN, BUT I WORKED, HAD A LIFE SO TO SPEAK. I WAS CONTENT. SO WAS MY HUSBAND. UNTIL I HAD TO HAVE A CHILD THEN – OR- NOT SITUATION I HADNT REALLY CONSIDERED IT. I LOVE MY SON WOULDNT CHANGE ANYTHING IN THE WORLD ABOUT HIM. BUT I WOULD LIKE TO ADOPT SOMEDAY. BUT THE CLOCK IS TICKING ON THAT AS WELL, SINCE I AM HEADING TOWARD 40 AND IT IS SO EXPENSIVE AND THE ECONOMY ETC. WHO KNOWS. BUT WITH ONE CHILD , IT IS NOT “AS BAD” AS HAVING NO CHILDREN AND THE STIGMA FROM THAT. BUT IT HAS ITS COMMENTS. OH, WHY NOT HAVE MORE. BLAH BLAH. I USED TO FEEL LESS COMPLETE AT TIMES BECAUSE OF ONLY HAVING ONE. NOW, I DONT CARE WHAT PEOPLE THINK, SAY OR COMMENT. ITS NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS. IF YOU HAVE BABIES, WONDERFUL, IF YOU DONT HAVE BABIES , WONDERFUL, JUST BE YOU AND BE HAPPY. YOU SOUND HAPPY WITHOUT CHILDREN. AND BUSY, AND CONTENT. TIME WILL TELL IF YOU CHANGE.

]]> By: Anna http://pastaqueen.com/blog/2009/02/about-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-20813 Anna Sun, 08 Feb 2009 20:32:15 +0000 http://pastaqueen.com/blog/?p=1036#comment-20813 @Carolyn - I disagree. I worked for the WIC program and talked to multiple parents every day. Some people can not step up the plate and do right by their children. They should not be parents and never appreciated their children. It's not a class thing, I know upper-income children whose parents never showed indications of love and only disgust. Kids are great but not for everyone. People who really love kids should really consider fostering or adopting one of those poor kids whose parents are really obviously not committed to the task. @Carolyn – I disagree. I worked for the WIC program and talked to multiple parents every day. Some people can not step up the plate and do right by their children. They should not be parents and never appreciated their children. It’s not a class thing, I know upper-income children whose parents never showed indications of love and only disgust. Kids are great but not for everyone. People who really love kids should really consider fostering or adopting one of those poor kids whose parents are really obviously not committed to the task.

]]> By: auntie http://pastaqueen.com/blog/2009/02/about-kids/comment-page-1/#comment-20812 auntie Sun, 08 Feb 2009 17:12:20 +0000 http://pastaqueen.com/blog/?p=1036#comment-20812 I'm 36 and I'm on the same page with you! Love my niece and nephews to pieces. Love holding my friends' babies and buying gifts. But most days, it's all I can do to keep track of myself, much less a little person that is going to rely on me for EVERYTHING. Yikes! I’m 36 and I’m on the same page with you! Love my niece and nephews to pieces. Love holding my friends’ babies and buying gifts. But most days, it’s all I can do to keep track of myself, much less a little person that is going to rely on me for EVERYTHING. Yikes!

]]>