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Please do not put you name or url in the body of your comments

Oh. My. God.

Please do not put your name or URL in the body of your comments.

I did not make this policy clear until a week ago. Those of you who did this before then, I forgive. You did not know any better.

I recently put this policy in bold in the comment disclaimer at the bottom of every page, right below the “Submit” button. Yet, people still left their names and URLs in the body of comments. I privately emailed them and asked them to stop doing this. They apologized and I forgave them.

Tonight, I added another disclaimer, right above the body section of the comment, just in case people didn’t scroll down all the way to see the other disclaimer. And yet again, someone just left their name in the body of the comment.

So now, I am writing this post, and I am asking you, for the love of all that is holy or unholy in this universe, DO NOT PUT YOUR NAME OR URL IN THE BODY OF YOUR COMMENTS. There are fields for that data. Putting them in the body is redundant. It pisses me off. It makes me want to murder you and everyone you have ever loved, including that boy you kissed in elementary school.

And I know, as I write this, that many of you will be mumbling to yourselves, “Wow, PastaQueen has finally lost her shit, hasn’t she?” Yes, yes I have. If you haven’t been able to read between the lines of this blog, my life has been a miserable ball of crap recently. I am hanging on by a thread. And when you blatantly disregard a reasonable request that I have made easy for you to read, I am about THIS close to finally snapping and running through the streets in my pajamas screaming.

So, please do not be the person who finally pushes my schoolbus over the edge of a cliff. Leave that to the unfortunate asshole who cuts me off in traffic tomorrow. And before anyone asks, yes, I am seeking professional help and yes, I am on medication. I am doing my best to get by right now, but you are NOT helping me when you sign your name and URL in the comments. I know this is a stupid, stupid, stupid thing get angry over and the rage it has induced in me is a sign of my own current mental instability, but please, PLEASE, PLEASE, do NOT sign your name or URL in the comments. And please, do not even sign your name or URL in the comments on this entry as a joke. I bill ban you and that will be it.

Thank you and good night. I will tell my psychologist you say hello.

Chocolate & Vicodin: My Quest for Relief from the Headache that Wouldn't Go Away
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76 Comments

Bionic Librarian • January 6, 2009 at 8:50 pm

Just wanted to give you a cyber hug – sounds like you can use one…

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Jen, a priorfatgirl • January 6, 2009 at 8:56 pm

You are motivation for so many – I hope you continue to grow & develop and most of all, I hope you find a reason each day to keep smiling! You are awesome!!!

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PastaQueen • January 6, 2009 at 8:57 pm

OMG, if felt so good to vent. Thank you, Meg, for signing your name in the comments! I feel so much better now. (And I mean this seriously, not sarcastically. I’ve been holding in this shit for far too long.)

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Charlie Hills • January 6, 2009 at 8:59 pm

I posted a comment a day or two ago with a link to a specific post on my site, which was relevant to your post. Is that okay? I figured that was easier than telling people to click on my name then having them hunt down the specific post. (It never showed up, though, so it looks like it got caught as spam anyway.)

Just to be safe, though, I’m going to call every boy I kissed in elementary school.

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Elyse • January 6, 2009 at 9:00 pm

Just a comment from a possible transgressor….adding my name at the end of a comment somehow humanizes the medium…..makes the communication a tad more personal – but I will obey, so not to cause you any more pain – feel better….

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PastaQueen • January 6, 2009 at 9:04 pm

@Charlie Hills – If the link is relevant, that is totally okay. It only angers me when someone duplicates the same link they include in the URL field because the only reason someone would do that is to promote themselves. If people want an ad, they can purchase one at a reasonable price.

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cindy • January 6, 2009 at 9:37 pm

Dear PQ,

I LOVE YOU!

I love you for this show of humanity and for your humor in it. It is what brings me back every day. I laugh, snort milk, learn something, connect to the ideas of others and witness another human being’s offerings. You are the greatest, even when you are pissed.

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Rachel • January 6, 2009 at 9:40 pm

I totally agree that those who put their URLs in the body of the comment are self-promoting. But I’d imagine the name thing is just a habit… wouldn’t you think? Like signing an email? I sign my emails with my name even though it’s clearly in my signature (and the recipient’s inbox) as a way of personalizing. Just food for thought; hopefully it helps ease the rage instead of inflaming it.

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Sarah • January 6, 2009 at 10:01 pm

Is it wrong to call the violators webtards? Because I do. I want to call them webtards.

A vent is good for the soul, too bad it isn’t a known headache cure.

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Ashley • January 6, 2009 at 10:07 pm

I hope things get better for you soon:)

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Mrs darling • January 6, 2009 at 10:19 pm

Oh my word Jeanette you have just voiced a huge irritation of mine. It always seems to me that commentors who leave their link in the body of the comment are trying to pull people to their own blogs. Its so redundant and I dont care how webtarded they are its up to them to learn the rules! Gah! This irritates me to the core of my being and I havent even got your excuse since Im hanging on by a full rope!

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Merry • January 6, 2009 at 10:25 pm

The most depressing part of being a technical writer is the knowledge that nobody reads the instructions unless they can’t help it.

I just know there are people who only now have gotten the message.

p.s. M’dear PQ, if venting helps you feel better, please vent some more!

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fatbridesmaid • January 6, 2009 at 10:26 pm

((((((((((((HUG))))))))))))

I hope you start feeling better soon!

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Elizabeth • January 6, 2009 at 10:30 pm

Oh, no! I really really hope things get better soon! I really really do.

And I will try to follow the rules :)

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Madison • January 6, 2009 at 10:34 pm

i love how you speak your mind. and, i really really hope things get better for you soon

i agree the url in the comment section thing is pretty annoying..

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Dee • January 6, 2009 at 10:36 pm

Is it bad that this made me laugh??

Not AT you. At the rant, I promise.

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floating princess • January 6, 2009 at 10:43 pm

***hugs*** I’m sorry you’re in the middle of the suck, but don’t you just love how liberating a good rant feels sometimes? There are days when it is just sooooo good!

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Rachie • January 6, 2009 at 11:00 pm

I’m sure you didn’t mean that to be so funny, but it made me chuckle. Mild-mannered Jennette finally SNAPS over names and URLs in comments! I love it! The way I see it: your blog, your rules–you can rip anybody who doesn’t respect your wishes. On the other hand, I’m sorry to hear things are tough for you right now. I hope they get better soon. :(

PS I completely agree that URLs are self-promoting and TA-CKY.

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lori • January 6, 2009 at 11:03 pm

*Backing out of the room slowly*

Hope tomorrow’s a better day.

I’m not a hugger, how bout a high five?

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Theantijared • January 6, 2009 at 11:21 pm

I agree with you! I hate when people sneak it in a the end of the comment with a “by the way”!

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PastaQueen • January 6, 2009 at 11:24 pm

Thanks, everybody! I had a nice cry over my miserable life and talked to my mom for an hour and I feel sooooooooooooooooo much better after admitting my life has been the suck lately. Thanks for all your well wishes.

And BTW, this entry is sooooooooo not about the name and url in the body, for anybody who was making counter arguments. It’s about the straw that finally broke my back after all the crap I’ve been through this year.

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anji • January 6, 2009 at 11:44 pm

Hey! I wonder if you get free rubber rooms somewhere? I’d totally be up for a visit to one of those… I think I may be a guilty being, with typing my name at the end… I think it’s just a habit, from e-mail and stuff… I think I used to (and sometimes) end my blog entries too that way. I guess sometimes, I just need the extra name to validate my existence. I may forget from the beginning of my comment to the end, who I am. Seriously, some days… however, as for the URL? That would totally piss me off… :D

D’oh!! ……. ohhhhhhh, I SO am a name-signer-off-er, I nearly did it right this second. Slap me with that wet noodle now!

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Monica • January 6, 2009 at 11:44 pm

I’m almost scared to put my name in the boxes above. j/k Glad you got those nasty negative feelings off your chest. It’s usually the smallest things that make us finally snap and go into a big long insane rant about nothingness just to get the yuck out. I hope it helped you. I spent almost 2 hours the other night whining and bitching to my own mom, very therapeutic.

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Crabby McSlacker • January 6, 2009 at 11:44 pm

Sorry to hear about life being so crappy lately! I can totally, totally understand going nutso over something like blog urls in comments. Something about taking the time to instruct and clarify and having people totally blow it off–that would bug me too.

I wish I could be nearly as entertaining when totally losing it, but my form of venting usually involves kicking, slamming, and otherwise abusing inanimate objects–not writing funny and endearing blog posts.

Feel better soon!

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foo • January 6, 2009 at 11:46 pm

Mom’s rock. Glad you are feeling even a little better. Chronic pain sucks. I’ve been living with it for the past 12 years. Breaking points are very easy to reach. Hang in there and I hope you find answers soon.

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Erin • January 6, 2009 at 11:48 pm

I just want to give you a big hug. I’ve just started reading recently, but it didn’t take long to know just how awesome you are. Anyway, hang in there!! Sending lots of good thoughts your way!

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Merry Mary • January 6, 2009 at 11:49 pm

Wow. Sometimes you just have to vent. It feels good to threaten the people that annoy you. I’m sorry things have been crappy lately. Heres hoping they start looking up and people stop trying to put their names and urls in the comments.

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Theresa • January 7, 2009 at 12:00 am

Pasta Queen,

I read you faithfully but rarely take the time to respond.

I’m sorry you have been having such a tough time lately. I wish there was something I could do to make it better. I just want you to know you are in my thoughts a prayers.

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kathryn • January 7, 2009 at 12:01 am

I am totally, totally with you on this one. It seems self-promoting and as one commenter says – tacky. But then any sniff of others self-promoting on my blog annoys the hell out of me.

Sorry to hear you’re having a tough time. There really is nothing like a big cry and a long talk with your mum to make things better. At least in the short term. Best wishes to you.

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v'ron • January 7, 2009 at 12:01 am

Ugh, I totally understand about the rant. I totaly understand about the straw that broke the camel’s back. I’ve been out of it because I’ve had a crap year too and I’m sorry to hear I’m not alone in this.

And I totally understand because I nearly killed the clerk at the drive-through who put the coins on top of the dollar bill when she gave me my change, a peeve of mine that I have taken waaaaayyyyy too much bandwidth ranting about.

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Megan • January 7, 2009 at 12:02 am

Hugs.

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Tara • January 7, 2009 at 12:08 am

I know how you feel – sometimes, when things are bad, all it takes it the tiniest thing to make you explode. I really hope that you feel better soon, it’s a terrible feeling to have your life become a sinkhole.

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Shannon • January 7, 2009 at 12:36 am

I’ve loved your blog (and your Twitter) for ages, and just wanted to send along an “amen!” to your post. Hope tomorrow is much more fabulous day for you!

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Susan • January 7, 2009 at 1:07 am

Oh man, that rager was almost as satisfying as if I’d written it myself! Good for you! Now I just wish we could take chronic pain out back and kick the hell out of it…

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Tam • January 7, 2009 at 1:23 am

First of all I want to say that this post was amazing! I am so glad that there are others in this world that get extremely angry over very small things. Your rant made me laugh and that made my day, so thank you, PastaQueen :)

I ran into your book on Amazon and then I frantically searched for your blog. I have been quietly reading all of your previous posts and your success has inspired me to start my own blog. It will hopefully push me to start shedding poundage.. I just have to get around to actually posting..

Back on topic, I hope that everything works out and that your life becomes a less miserable ball of crap. If it makes you feel any better, I’m not doing so hot myself. But, who is? I certainly don’t know anyone who is perfectly happy with their perfect little lives. So cheer up, there are brighter days to come sometime in the future.

#sorry for the super long post, I tend to get carried away

#I am VERY tempted to sign my name at the end of the post, but out of respect, I will not

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moonduster • January 7, 2009 at 1:43 am

I hope I’ve never done either of those things (name or url in post).

And I hope things are looking up for you.

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Becky • January 7, 2009 at 1:49 am

PQ- I think that it is completely within your realm to have any and all rules on “your” blog. So many of us love reading your blog day in and day out. Guess what? We read it for free too! So I hope your kind request does not fall on deaf ears or unkind eyes! Hope things look up for you soon!

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mo pie • January 7, 2009 at 1:52 am

Love you, girl.

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Lydia • January 7, 2009 at 2:15 am

Hang in there, Jennette.

Can you get away for a while — a real vacation? I wish I could.

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Megan • January 7, 2009 at 2:21 am

Oh, I’m having such empathy pains over this post, because I have SO been there. I have Interstitial Cystitis, a chronic bladder pain disorder, and have been in some amount of pain for the last four years. I’m pretty much in the acceptance stage, but two years ago I was basically my own black hole, sucking myself into a depression nobody I knew could understand. It’s still hard, though, obviously. Maintaining my weight was difficult before the pain; maintaining it now sometimes feels impossible (and, quite frankly, is often the least of my worries). So, y’know, not to quote a creepy Michael Jackson song, but you are not alone.

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hanlie • January 7, 2009 at 3:21 am

Jennette, I totally agree that on your blog your rules apply!

I’m sorry that things aren’t so great for you at the moment and really hope that they improve soon.

I’m glad that you’re sharing this with us, because I think there’s still a general idea out there that our lives will be perfect once we lose weight. That’s so not true! Our lives will be different and we’ll be thinner, but we will still face all the challenges that go with living.

Thank you for always being real. Thinking of you!

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Minze • January 7, 2009 at 3:46 am

De-lurking to say that I wish I could do or say something to make you feel a little better. I hope that the wind may be at your back from now on. All the best.

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Princess Dieter • January 7, 2009 at 3:58 am

I plead guilty. Not of the url, but of signing name. Just a habit. So used to it, that it’s hard to break, not matter what little admonitions. Will attempt to break said habit to aid in your peace of mind. :)

Be better and better soon and soon, PQ.

…must…not…sign..name..must…not…

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dg • January 7, 2009 at 4:22 am

Jennette, this has been one of my pet peeves since the dawn of time. i’ve got it in RED BOLD TEXT above my comment box and people still ignore it, and by people i mean people trying to boost their google ranking by littering my comments with their shoddy diet urls. So i understand your rage and good on you for letting it all out, comrade!!!!!

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dg • January 7, 2009 at 4:28 am

furthermore i’m sorry things have been sucking so hard for so long… i wish i could take you out to the pub and get you hammered then give you an all-expenses month-long vacation to a tropical island. thinking of you PQ.

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crazylady • January 7, 2009 at 4:45 am

Big hugs from me. Hope things improve for you in 2009. Hang on in there. Surely things can only get better !? :)

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Kate • January 7, 2009 at 5:41 am

You make me feel better for silent raging when people use text speak in emails/posts/locations where you can access a fully qwerty keyboard and each letter is FREE or when people say “you’re great” and “their fine”

It might be the hormones (twins expected any day now) but these things have really been irking me off lately.

Oh, and if one more person tells me I’m small for twins I will shoot them…the irony of a former fat person having a hard time eating has not been lost on me.

*hugs*

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fd • January 7, 2009 at 7:12 am

Merry Christmas (by the other calendar)!!

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kate • January 7, 2009 at 7:19 am

You are so awesome. Seriously. I hope you realize that. This is possibly one of my favorite posts of any blog, let alone of yours. I don’t mean to enjoy it when you’re at your lowest. I think we all go through times where we’re like, “Enough already!” I know I do. This is small, stupid advice, but hang in there. From reading your blog, I’ve realized that you’ve been going through tough times, and we (the readers) probably only read 1/1000th of it. It will get better.

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Shelley • January 7, 2009 at 7:27 am

Just wanted to add another hug for you – I hope that 2009 is a much better year for you and that your headache finally gets cured!

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Debbi • January 7, 2009 at 7:28 am

How is it possible that so very many of us had sucky 2008s? Let’s hope 2009 is a complete turnaround. I wish there was something concrete I could do, but cyber-sympathy (-empathy) is about all I can offer right now. Glad the rant made you feel better for a little while …

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Jen • January 7, 2009 at 7:45 am

I had to giggle when I saw, “PastaQueen has finally lost her shit…”

Glad your mom was able to talk you down.

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Unknown • January 7, 2009 at 8:22 am

Jesus Christ – this is your only bitch that you have in your life… you must be a happy person

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Rachel • January 7, 2009 at 8:38 am

Strange – I’ve read a few blogs this morning about meltdowns occuring yesterday – unfortunately I’m one of them – I snapped because my boyfriend gently suggested that I not watch another dvd and help him clean up instead. Then I had a big crying fit over just wanting to relax before ‘my life will be over’ when grad school starts up tomorrow.

What? “Life over”? Am I 12?

Feels better to get it off your chest – I’m much cheerier this morning. Hope you are too. :)

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Jill • January 7, 2009 at 8:42 am

@v’ron – OMGosh that is my biggest peave ever!!!! WHY WHY WHY do they do that??? Can’t they see how awkward and time consuming it is for us when they do that????

whew – I feel better now.

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Jill • January 7, 2009 at 8:46 am

@Unknown – you haven’t been reading here long, have you? This isn’t her only bitch – and next time you have a bad day, I hope someone will be kinder to you than you are being to PQ.

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Jill • January 7, 2009 at 8:50 am

Now that I have commented on everyone else’s comments, I just want to say that reading your rant actually made me feel better.

And why does crying to mom always seem to make it all better? Right before Christmas I had a breakdown and cried to my mom for an hour. After that, I felt so much better. Gotta love the moms.

Hugs to you girl.

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Mom • January 7, 2009 at 8:54 am

@PastaQueen – Yall, she is doing better. We had several very good laughs during our phone conversation last night. She called me after posting the rant and before I found it so that I would not freak out when I did read it. She just needed to blow a gasket. It was a great release. And I won’t sign my name–I think I might have been one of the offenders!

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Gigi • January 7, 2009 at 9:32 am

Venting is the first sign of healing – right? Hope you’re having a better day than the next asshole who cuts you off in traffic. Feel better!

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Liz • January 7, 2009 at 9:46 am

Oh, PQ. Who knew that if you just lost your shit all your readers would send you messages of love and support? You apparently should have lost your shit about 6 months ago and saved yourself that whole period of nearly-losing-it.

Isn’t it weird how something relatively innocuous, on the wrong day, can seem like a nuclear detonator? I’ve had days like that myself. Not that you need my empathy, but you do have it. I’m also impressed that you could vent and yet keep your humor. That tells me you aren’t too far gone. :)

Take care girl-

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Brandi • January 7, 2009 at 10:54 am

You rant all you want. This is your blog, if someone doesn’t like it, they can suck it. :)

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Tai • January 7, 2009 at 11:50 am

If you are reduced to running through the streets in your jammies; at least you will look nice wearing the new Vera Wang jammies you got!

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deanna • January 7, 2009 at 12:01 pm

Vent away Mama!!! Everyone needs to do it and I am happy to read it. And feel better, pulling for you!

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Karen • January 7, 2009 at 12:18 pm

Wow!

I was totally believing that you truly had lost your mind, since I read your blog often and couldn’t remember ever seeing urls in the comments!

And, agreed, that would be rudely self-promoting.

After scrolling down to the bottom of the comments page, I discover that you edit out the urls. No wonder you’re frustrated!

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Liska Life • January 7, 2009 at 12:26 pm

As a recent blogger I am enjoying learning new things and getting to know people’s likes and dislikes, so all taken on board. Thanks for an entertaining read, and we are all here to support you and each other x

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Laura Brandon • January 7, 2009 at 2:31 pm

Wow. I hope things get better for you soon.

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Ellen • January 7, 2009 at 4:15 pm

I am going to have to be really careful about this one, since I tend to skim over things I think I’ve already read (ie. the old PQ disclaimer about the pasta army). Not the URL thing, cause that’s just lame to do (unless it is to a specific post that ties in with the discussion, as you mentioned previously), but the name at the end thing. I do that out of habit all the time. Maybe it is because of email. I wonder who else I’ve annoyed by doing that.

I’m hoping to comply with this 100%, but maybe I can get a pass if I accidentally forget? Maybe I should just revert back to the 100% lurker I used to be instead of the 90% lurker 10% participant I am now…if it saves me from being banned for life it would be worth the de-evolution!! :)

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Ellen • January 7, 2009 at 4:16 pm

I am going to have to be really careful about this one, since I tend to skim over things I think I’ve already read (ie. the old PQ disclaimer about the pasta army). Not the URL thing, cause that’s just lame to do (unless it is to a specific post that ties in with the discussion, as you mentioned previously), but the name at the end thing. I do that out of habit all the time. Maybe it is because of email. I wonder who else I’ve annoyed by doing that.

I’m hoping to comply with this 100%, but maybe I can get a pass if I accidentally forget? Maybe I should just revert back to the 100% lurker I used to be instead of the 90% lurker 10% participant I am now…if it saves me from being banned for life it would be worth the de-evolution!! :)

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Ellen • January 7, 2009 at 4:17 pm

Ack!! And then I accidentally commented twice! I think I need to get away from my computer before I do something stupid…oy.

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Liz B. • January 7, 2009 at 4:26 pm

A recently new reader, and newbie blogger, I love your blog and your blatent honesty. Better to kick and scream than to eat, right?

I’m sorry about the pain, and I do hope things get worked out. I just know that my chronic pain gets kissed goodbye at 7:00am and doesn’t return until 6:30pm.

There’s a lot of love here, so hang tight!

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Cat • January 7, 2009 at 6:08 pm

We all have our moments, and I can feel you on the losing your sh*t…I’ve been in that place since I got laid off a month and two weeks ago and I haven’t been able to see the forest for the trees. What I mean is, I really like reading your entries, and I think you are an excellent writer and a very kind person, and I just wanted to give you a shout out that someone out here in cyberspace is losing her marbles as well, for whatever that’s worth. and yes, cyber *hugs* all around.

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Nicole • January 7, 2009 at 9:18 pm

I do hope this entry someday gives you as good of a laugh as it gave me (and it did me a lot of good -I recognize the urge- thank you). Until then, I am glad that you are doing better. There is little more stressful than having health issues and job uncertainties at the same time.

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Jen • January 7, 2009 at 9:34 pm

@Megan – I have IC too, but haven’t noticed that it affects my weight– mainly because when I’m having an attack I can’t think about anything but curling up in a ball on the couch around my heating pad and drinking lots of water to try to flush my system (which probably doesn’t do anything at all, but somehow I think it should…). Is it the daily stress of the chronic pain? Have you made dietary changes? I don’t know anyone else with this and am curious…

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s • January 8, 2009 at 2:39 am

i have had days like this, ok maybe not exactly, but i can analogously relate, at least tangentially.

i’m glad you are feeling better now.

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Brandi • January 8, 2009 at 6:50 pm

Wow. I love this blog totally but I must admit I was shocked to see that level of anger here. Then again, it’s been said many times here that a good rant is a good thing … and I have been known to rant a bit myself on my own blog.

I just wanted you to know that I’m feeling the urge to call you again so you can yell it out and have someone to listen to … glad to hear that you and your mom are close enough for you to call and let go with her. You are often in my prayers, and I hope things pick up for you soon …

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Cat • February 16, 2010 at 11:27 am

You need therapy.

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Comments are now closed on all PastaQueen entries. The blog is an archive only so I don't have to deal with spammers. For fresh discussions please visit my new blog JenFul.

Man looking into telescope

Jennette Fulda tells stories to the Internet about her life as a smartass, writer, weight-loss inspiration, chronic headache sufferer, and overall nice person (who is silently judging you). She does this at JenFul now, but you can still have fun perusing her past here.

Disclaimer: I am not responsible for keyboards ruined by coffee spit-takes or forehead wrinkles caused by deep thought.

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