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The dangers of healthy eating

Healthy eating is by definition supposed to be good for your health. I obviously didn’t get the memo. Earlier this month, I grated off a piece of my thumb while making latkes. This week, I cut myself horribly on . . .a box of Go Lean! Crunch.

Paper cut

Yes, eating cereal is now a health hazard. You heard it here first. I don’t know if the machine that assembles the cereal boxes was miscalibrated or they happened to sharpen their box cutting knives the day it was shipped, but the cardboard edge of my box cut into my pinkie as I was innocently pouring myself a sweet yet nutritious mix of seven whole grains. Think I have law suit material? I have now placed masking tape over the edge to avoid future incidents.

Go Lean! Crunch with masking tape

What’s next? Will I slip on a banana peel in the kitchen? Will my tongue get frozen to a no-sugar-added fudge pop? I fear to speculate.


In other news, I completely forgot my fat-iversary two days ago. As of January 15th I’ve been doing this healthy eating and exercise nonsense for three years. According to an article sent to me by the National Weight Control Registry as thanks for participating in their long-ass surveys, “after individuals have successfully maintained their weight loss for 2-5 years, the chance of long-term success greatly increases.” Go me! Another two years and I’ll have the stats completely in my favor. (The article is called “Long-term weight-loss maintenance” from the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition, Issue 82, 2005. Pages 222-225. I’m not putting that in MLA format because I don’t know how and I find that stuff boring.)

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30 Comments

Kate • January 17, 2008 at 8:01 am

So maybe you should change your fat-iversary to your thin-iversary? :)

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Kate • January 17, 2008 at 8:01 am

So maybe you should change your fat-iversary to your thin-iversary? :)

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Kate • January 17, 2008 at 8:02 am

How ironic…. I seem to have fat fingered the Post button. LOL

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Janet • January 17, 2008 at 8:46 am

IMHO, you did/are continuing to do a wonderful job maintaining your weight loss. As a fat survivor myself, I know your struggle and how hard it was to accomplish. Be proud of yourself!

Happy Anniversary! Celebrate!

But please don’t be so hard on yourself. It’s not nonsense…gloat on your success, especially on your ‘Successiversary’.

Three years is a TRIUMPH! Embrace it! Rejoice!

As ‘Weight Watchers’ refers to my daughter as, “Our results not typical girl” I shall honor you with that title as well! :)

PQ – I don’t think my tone came across right once I sent this into the blogging void. I’m not being hard on myself. I’m proud of all I’ve accomplished.

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Debbi • January 17, 2008 at 8:56 am

Thanks for your great example, your constant inspiration, your innovative motivation and your amazing accessibility. (Did I spell that right?) I look forward to every Half of Me post.

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Nora • January 17, 2008 at 9:04 am

Hi, found this site coincidently, and very inspired me to loss weight. I started last year but it’s going up and down, only 1-2 kilos. Hope my dreams will come true this year to cut 20 kilos,Now, I’m 88kg stands on 164cm.

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Kate • January 17, 2008 at 9:12 am

LOL, I am sitting here with band-aids on 3 of my 10 fingers….why? Because I apparently can’t chop pepppers and onions without taking off hunks of my fingers with it. This isn’t the first time either, one would think I would learn. Who knew eating healthy could be so dangerous?

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Nancy • January 17, 2008 at 9:29 am

Happy Fativersary.. Or as Kate says Thin-aversary!

If you sue them, I’m joining the suit. THere is nothing worse than a cereal box cut on your finger.

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Red • January 17, 2008 at 9:43 am

I hear ya’. In one fell swoop, I knocked over a pan on the stove while making eggs, got burned by egg flying into my shirt, and then slipped on the stuff that landed on the floor while I was flailing to get the flying egg out of my shirt.

There’s definitely some sort of healthy-eating disaster pattern. Don’t take this the wrong way, but it’s nice to know that I’m not alone :-)

PQ – Dear Lord, I’m amazed your still alive after that! Though it was quite amusing to visualize.

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Sarah • January 17, 2008 at 9:55 am

Those surveys are long assed! You are well on your way. I’ve been down 185 pounds (more than what I weigh now) for 3 1/2 years. It’s a new life.

Congrats on yours!

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Mymsie • January 17, 2008 at 9:57 am

I’m slipped on a banana peel my freshman year of high school in front of EVERYONE in the lunchroom. Yowsa!

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Comrade GoGo • January 17, 2008 at 10:09 am

Happy belated weight-loss-iversary! You’ve accomplished so much, and I’m really excited for your book to be published this spring :).

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eva • January 17, 2008 at 10:16 am

Ouch! Well, no one said eating good is easy! No pain…then gain? Put superglue on that cut and you’ll be kitchen ready in minutes…and maybe put a on a helmet and knee pads, just to be safe :-)

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Mia • January 17, 2008 at 10:27 am

Why do those types of cuts hurt more than if you sawed off your arm or something? Crazy but true.

AND HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! That’s totally awesome.

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Danielle • January 17, 2008 at 10:29 am

Congrats on your 3 year anniversary!

What a fabulous accomplishment!

The cut looks painful.

I work in a restaurant where we have to fold pizza boxes, which usually results in several little box cuts. Usually not a big deal until you have to then cut lemon wedges the next day. Lemon juice + box cuts= owie!

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Bella • January 17, 2008 at 12:01 pm

I guess this is what they mean when they say, “no pain, no gain,” right? :) Ok, bad play on words.

Thanks for sharing the article. As much as I worry about the statistic of 95% of people who lose weight won’t keep it off, I’m fairly confident that I’ll be in the other 5% because I’m making this a lifestyle change, as you did. When I read through your blog and saw all of the new fitness and food choices you were making, I knew that you were going to do it. and you did!

I’m hoping I have even half as much of your success!!

PQ – Well, according to the article it’s more like 20% are successful at long-term weight loss, where the loss is defined as greater than 10% and maintenance is defined as greater than a year. So maybe that will cheer you up!

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Rah • January 17, 2008 at 12:12 pm

Congratulations, PQ, on your health-iversary! You continue to be an inspiration to a lot of people, including me. I often think of the guts it took for you to share your journey with the world, and many have benefited from your courage.

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Keri-Ann • January 17, 2008 at 12:42 pm

LOL, Red! What a great visual! I hope you didn’t hurt yourself too bad.

Evidently it IS dangerous to eat healthy. I sliced the outside of my hand open while scooping out an all-organic rice-derived protein powder from it’s can, which had a razor-sharp edge.

My friend almost choked to death on that nasty low-carb Special K a couple years ago. She was home alone and had to use a chair to perform the Heimleich on herself. Can you imagine choking to death on something THAT awful? At least make it something worth it, like a cookie or something! ;-)

PQ – Okay, I’m curious, how do you percorm the Heimleich with a chair? Personally, one of my biggest fears is choking to death alone in my apartment, so if I can learn how to do this with my barstool it will be one less thing to worry about.

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Marianne • January 17, 2008 at 12:51 pm

Happy anniversary PQ!

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G.G. • January 17, 2008 at 1:22 pm

There must be an epidemic of healthy food preparation accidents. I beveled the top part of a thumb last week chopping up a bunch of bell peppers. That resulted in me saying many bad things and resenting the aforementioned peppers, which did nobody any good.

Happy transformation-initiation-anniversary!

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Stephanie Quilao • January 17, 2008 at 2:27 pm

Congratulations on keeping your healthy self for a few years now! That is awesome and inspiring. You know that you have made real long lasting lifestyle changes when you can maintain the healthy you for a long time. Bravo!

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dietgirl • January 17, 2008 at 3:32 pm

dude! sorry to hear about your gaping wound :) and go you on the three years of brilliant nonsense!

I’ve always found it cool that we have the same anniversary date… i can’t remember why i started on that particular date, maybe i’d been saying every day since Jan 1, “Right… the new year really starts… TODAY! no! i mean… tomorrow!”

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diamondwife • January 17, 2008 at 7:12 pm

Wow, how weird, I started my own quest for health 3 years ago as well. One day later than you…1/16/05.

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Manic Mommy • January 17, 2008 at 9:17 pm

OK, if that is cutting yourself “Horribly” then you definitely don’t want to donate blood! LOL!

Happy Fativersary!!!

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Cindy • January 17, 2008 at 10:06 pm

Well, you’ve just answered something for me.I’ve been wondering how to answer when people ask me “how long” I have been doing this. Somehow, starting at the beginning didn’t quite feel right, but I never knew when I was at a place to consider that I was in maintenance, either. I have sort of “eased into” maintenance by default, following a really long plateau. So now I know I can just say I started Labor Day week-end, 2005. In some ways, that feels like SO very, very long ago. I’ve been re-inventing myself so much since that time that it feels longer. And yet, the pain and worry and fear of those first days are still so “fresh,” that it seems like yesterday, too. Time can be a funny thing, that way.

Anyway, Happy Anniversary… or how about “Happy Re-Birthday”? Too corny?

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Lesley • January 18, 2008 at 5:12 am

My fat-iversary was 11th January of this year and it’s only been one year. Must keep vigilant for the next few to get and stay in the exclusive club of former fatties who’ve kept the weight off. Blog’s like yours really help.

No healthy eating relating injuries as yet – but had a close shave on Christmas Day when the knife I was using to cut a parsnip snapped and the blade flew across the kitchen narrowly missing my Mum!

Lesley x

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bisous • January 20, 2008 at 6:59 pm

Kashi Golean Crunch is dangerous! I stopped eating it after reading that two of my blog friends (in separate incidents) had chipped teeth on it. The regular kashi golean is less tasty, but not so risky.

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swizzlepop • January 21, 2008 at 12:19 pm

I just cut my thumb on the foil from a wine bottle. Not as healthy as the cereal but still good for you in moderation (red wine).

Happy anniversary! That is wonderful!

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Healthy Tips • January 22, 2008 at 2:59 am

Hehe… Ouch, huh? ;)

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another victim • April 23, 2009 at 7:50 pm

It happened to me too.

I picked up the box in the supermarket and got cut right there and then!

I checked another box, they all got the same sharp edge.

I reported to Kashi and got no response from them.

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Jennette Fulda tells stories to the Internet about her life as a smartass, writer, weight-loss inspiration, chronic headache sufferer, and overall nice person (who is silently judging you). She does this at JenFul now, but you can still have fun perusing her past here.

Disclaimer: I am not responsible for keyboards ruined by coffee spit-takes or forehead wrinkles caused by deep thought.

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