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The yeast also rises

I regret to inform you that my bread machine is dead.

”The

These are the shattered remains of the plastic doohickey that spins the thingamajig on the bottom of the bread pan. The technical language is confusing, I know, but needless to say there will be no kneading done by my Sunbeam breadmaker until I get a replacement part. I choose to believe the plastic broke due to poor construction and had nothing to do with the big rock of brown sugar I dumped in the pan as part of the recipe.

I had emptied all the ingredients in the pan and was starting to make a phone call when the breadmaker went into the kneading cycle and made a startling “thur-ump, thur-ump” sound. After I investigated and discovered the broken plastic, I had no choice but to actually hand knead my dough. And then I put it in a greased pan to rise. And then I baked it. It was very Little House on the Prairie.

”Bread

But it turned out great. It didn’t rise as much as it usually does, but the bread was soft and doughy and very yummy. I’ll have to remember the experience well because I don’t feel like going to the appliance repair store any time this week and they’re probably closed for Christmas. Then I’ll have to spend some bread to get my bread back.

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29 Comments

KBR • December 19, 2007 at 7:03 am

What sort of bread is this please?

PQ – It’s multi-grain. I used whole-wheat flour and the Kashi multi-grain cereal. It’s a recipe from the breadmaker book.

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Debbi • December 19, 2007 at 8:12 am

I actually enjoy kneading bread by hand; it just feels so much more real than tossing ingredients into a well and pulling a loaf of bread out later. I probably won’t be leaving my house today – unexpected snow/sleet – I’ll be getting my hands all floury and sticky myself.

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Olivia • December 19, 2007 at 8:31 am

Looks delicious. Next time you have a rock of brown sugar try nuking it in the microwave for a minute or two.

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eva • December 19, 2007 at 8:47 am

That looks great! And kneading bread by hand burns more calories….and is good for the biceps :-) My grandmother makes bread herself and you just cannot compare it to store bought. She rolls perfect portion sizes into rolls, cooks them and then freezes them. So she always has fresh bread on hand. Good luck finding that part. (and thanks for changing my post yesterday…and you even fixed my typos!)

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Marianne • December 19, 2007 at 9:14 am

Just coming out from lurking to give you a hint that you probaly all ready know. In order to reduce the rockiness of brown surgar put in a hunk of bread. I just love the Food Network, don’t you?

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Zentient • December 19, 2007 at 9:22 am

Kneading bread is good for you, but a KitchenAid mixer with a dough hook is a great investment. I want to eat an entire loaf with a stick of butter. Learning to eat foods I love in proper amounts is something I’m working intensely on right now. A King Leo chocolate covered peppermint stick is 70 calories. I received a box for a present, and not only has it been good practice to eat one, I’ve been more generous in sharing them instead of eating the whole box myself. Sorry to get off topic. Your bread does look nice, winter and homemade bread are a perfect combination.

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MB • December 19, 2007 at 9:39 am

Mmmmmm…fresh bread…mmmmmmmm….

I always wanted a bread machine but I don’t think I can be trusted with one. Your bread looks amazing. Good luck trying to get your machine fixed without spending lots of dough.

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AMD • December 19, 2007 at 10:32 am

Coming out of lurkerville to say: I got my last two breadmakers at local thrift shops… One for $10 and one for $5 to replace the $10 one after a year. Just in case Sunbeam wants zillions for a new thingbobby! If they even offer that option…

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Rah • December 19, 2007 at 10:51 am

You could probably skip the repair store and order the part online if you know where the part goes, and how it fits. Usually your instruction manual will tell you the proper name and number for parts.

PQ – I checked the manual, but it didn’t say. The Subeam web site directed me to local repair stores.

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Nancy Bea • December 19, 2007 at 10:54 am

An appliance repair store!?! Wow, how wonderful. You must live in a charming old-fashioned part of the world. We don’t seem to have such things here on the fast-paced, hard-edged East Coast!

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Crabby Mcslacker • December 19, 2007 at 11:06 am

Is anyone else’s Amazon ad showing the album “The Best of Bread?” Or is it just ’cause I’m a boomer who might actually be tempted to buy it again?

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Laura • December 19, 2007 at 11:20 am

Hello There,

My name is Laura, and I bumped into your website as I was searching on weight loss. I was blown away by not only your tech skills (I’m SO. IN. LOVE. with the 3-D progress shots!) but by your achievement. I am also somebody trying to lose half my body weight (I’m 5’9 and I started out at 310lbs, but now I’m at 278 and still busting my ass). I’m wondering if something like what’s happening to me has happened to you anywhere along the way;

There are some people(women) that I see everyday that have noticed what I’m doing (since I’m doing Weight Watcher’s and I use my little WW calculator for everything that I eat), and keep trying to offer me fatty, processed food to derail me. At first, I thought I might be being a bit paranoid and they were just doing it out of kindness or generosity.

But now it’s gotten to be like, RIDICULOUS. I can’t go a day out of the week where something, whether it be doughnuts, McDonald’s, candy, whatever, ends up being waved in front of my face. Every time, I firmly say no and refuse (I’m pretty damn determined), and they’re like, “Are you sure? It’s good! Just try it!” Ugh. And they’ve even gone as far as to buy a full-sized Burger King meal and plop it in front of me, even though I had told them that my lunch was heating up in the microwave.

Did anybody ever try sabotaging you like this, or even alienating you because you were losing weight? If so, what did you do?

PQ – Laura, I was very lucky that everyone was supportive of my weight loss. I also worked at a small company at the time, so there were only two other people there, both guys, who never tried to stuff cheeseburgers down my throat. I’m sorry people are doing that to you. You’re going to have to stand up to them and tell them no. You can try to find a polite way to tell them they are being rude and disrespectful of your choices. Try to find a tactful way to tell them to knock it off already. You’re not alone though, Marla wrote about how her mother-in-law tried to force feed her one weekend.

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Marianne • December 19, 2007 at 12:37 pm

It was very Little House on the Prairie. Bwahahaha. This bread looks deliciously healthy, PQ!

Also – Laura – wow, people really are just jerks sometimes, aren’t they? I’m sorry people aren’t respecting your choices!

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Sharon • December 19, 2007 at 12:48 pm

Turns out you don’t even really have to knead. Bittman wrote about a no-knead bread in the NY Times last fall, and here’s a link to another variation on that same theme:

http://wednesdaychef.typepad.com/the_wednesday_chef/2006/11/jim_laheys_nokn.html

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eva • December 19, 2007 at 1:49 pm

Ok…this is unrelated but I stumbled upon something and I had to let every one know about it. At jcpenny.com there is something called “Sure Fit” they ask you all kinds of questions about your measurements and body shape and then you can choose the kind of jeans you want and they are custom made to your body! They are about $50 but sound very worth it. (If you go to JC Penny’s website and enter “womens sure fit jeans” it will bring you to the right spot.)

Anyways, I know what I’m going to do the next time I find $50 in the pocket of my winter coat!

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dietgirl • December 19, 2007 at 6:26 pm

just wanted to say… best entry title ever. hehe :)

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Jenny • December 19, 2007 at 7:04 pm

My Father, who won a blue ribbon for his bread once told me to never make bread with a break maker.

So I just buy it at the store.

Great title today, I agree.

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Liza • December 19, 2007 at 8:47 pm

The “doohicky” in our house is called the “pooper”…why, you ask? Why because that’s what my ten year old called it when we pulled out our first loaf of breadmachine bread. “Wow, Mom, it’s got a POOPER!”

Yes, dear, it does. :)

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Seeker • December 19, 2007 at 10:40 pm

Pastaqueen, This is the first time I’m coming to your blog and I’m hooked. Your blog is truly motivational for people trying to lose weight. In fact, after losing so much weight, you can motivate anybody to achieve the most difficult task. I’ll keep coming back to visit.

Btw the bread looks great :-)

———————–

My Positivity Blog http://positivityhub.com/

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Sarah J • December 20, 2007 at 7:14 am

Hey.. I have a breadmaker that has been rarely used, and not at all in 4 years… I’ll ship it to you! Just let me know! It would declutter me!

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J&Z'sMom • December 30, 2007 at 11:41 am

Buy a Welbilt! Two weeks ago in a freak bread machine accident, I lost my fingernail to the bread machine!!! I’m sorry to say, it’s “well-built.”

The moral of the story? Do not put your hands down in there while it’s kneading. It doesn’t care if it’s throwing flour everywhere!

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J&Z'sMom • December 30, 2007 at 11:41 am

Buy a Welbilt! Two weeks ago in a freak bread machine accident, I lost my fingernail to the bread machine!!! I’m sorry to say, it’s “well-built.”

The moral of the story? Do not put your hands down in there while it’s kneading. It doesn’t care if it’s throwing flour everywhere!

PermalinkReply

J&Z'sMom • December 30, 2007 at 11:41 am

Buy a Welbilt! Two weeks ago in a freak bread machine accident, I lost my fingernail to the bread machine!!! I’m sorry to say, it’s “well-built.”

The moral of the story? Do not put your hands down in there while it’s kneading. It doesn’t care if it’s throwing flour everywhere!

PermalinkReply

J&Z'sMom • December 30, 2007 at 11:41 am

Buy a Welbilt! Two weeks ago in a freak bread machine accident, I lost my fingernail to the bread machine!!! I’m sorry to say, it’s “well-built.”

The moral of the story? Do not put your hands down in there while it’s kneading. It doesn’t care if it’s throwing flour everywhere!

PermalinkReply

J&Z'sMom • December 30, 2007 at 11:41 am

Buy a Welbilt! Two weeks ago in a freak bread machine accident, I lost my fingernail to the bread machine!!! I’m sorry to say, it’s “well-built.”

The moral of the story? Do not put your hands down in there while it’s kneading. It doesn’t care if it’s throwing flour everywhere!

PermalinkReply

J&Z'sMom • December 30, 2007 at 11:41 am

Buy a Welbilt! Two weeks ago in a freak bread machine accident, I lost my fingernail to the bread machine!!! I’m sorry to say, it’s “well-built.”

The moral of the story? Do not put your hands down in there while it’s kneading. It doesn’t care if it’s throwing flour everywhere!

PermalinkReply

J&Z'sMom • December 30, 2007 at 11:41 am

Buy a Welbilt! Two weeks ago in a freak bread machine accident, I lost my fingernail to the bread machine!!! I’m sorry to say, it’s “well-built.”

The moral of the story? Do not put your hands down in there while it’s kneading. It doesn’t care if it’s throwing flour everywhere!

PermalinkReply

J&Z'sMom • December 30, 2007 at 11:41 am

Buy a Welbilt! Two weeks ago in a freak bread machine accident, I lost my fingernail to the bread machine!!! I’m sorry to say, it’s “well-built.”

The moral of the story? Do not put your hands down in there while it’s kneading. It doesn’t care if it’s throwing flour everywhere!

PermalinkReply

J&Z'sMom • December 30, 2007 at 11:41 am

Buy a Welbilt! Two weeks ago in a freak bread machine accident, I lost my fingernail to the bread machine!!! I’m sorry to say, it’s “well-built.”

The moral of the story? Do not put your hands down in there while it’s kneading. It doesn’t care if it’s throwing flour everywhere!

PermalinkReply

Comments are now closed on all PastaQueen entries. The blog is an archive only so I don't have to deal with spammers. For fresh discussions please visit my new blog JenFul.

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Jennette Fulda tells stories to the Internet about her life as a smartass, writer, weight-loss inspiration, chronic headache sufferer, and overall nice person (who is silently judging you). She does this at JenFul now, but you can still have fun perusing her past here.

Disclaimer: I am not responsible for keyboards ruined by coffee spit-takes or forehead wrinkles caused by deep thought.

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