January 21, 2006 at 11:31 am
Up a pound this week, but that’s pretty much expected. I tend to lose a lot one week, then maintain or gain a small amount for the next two weeks. It all averages out.
Thanks to everyone who commented on my progress pictures! You all are too sweet. Nice to know the Internet isn’t full of creeps. There were far too many comments to reply to everyone but one person asked if my boss had said anything yet. The answer is no he hasn’t, but I think he’s just playing it safe. Can’t blame him. Commenting on someone’s weight loss can be like walking a minefield. Even if you want to say something complimentary it can explode in your face. He must have noticed by now. If he hasn’t, he must have cataracts.
I have also noticed that a certain amount of confidence has started bleeding over into other areas of my life. Like, I used to really hate it when I’d be walking down an aisle in a store and a clerk would ask “Can I help you?” Maybe this is some sort of middle class syndrome, but I feel like I should just do for myself. I went to a grocery store once where they bagged your groceries and actually walked the cart out to your car for you and it freaked me the fuck out. I really hope they didn’t expect a tip. This is the Midwest, not New York.
So when someone offered to help me at a store, I used to just mumble “No, thanks” and slump away. Now I find myself acting all chipper and saying “No, thank you” with a little smile on my face. I have the fake friendly but polite act down. I know this is a small thing, but there have been a lot of small things like this lately and they’re starting to add up.
I don’t think it is so much because of the physical loss either. I weighed this much in high school and was a shrinking violet always hiding behind my bushy hair and huge flannel shirts. I think I just feel very powerful and confident because I decided to make a positive change in my life and actually did it. It’s simple to say, but difficult to do. I am She-Ra! By the honor of Grayskull! (Sorry, 80’s American cartoon reference. You really don’t want to get me started about my She-Ra action figure collection.)